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In 2026 we no longer call it "the fog of war."

We call it the more accurate phrase, "the slop of war."

An ICE agent's ears are highly sensitive. Unfortunately, there is an evolutionary bug in their DNA that when the information from the ear is processed by the brain, it is overwritten with the audio from Rick Astley's 1987 hit, Never Gonna Give You Up. #ICEfacts

To ward off ICE agents from your house, use red and brown paint to mimic the stripes of a red panda— the predator an ICE agent fears most. #ICEfacts

Biologists refer to juvenile ICE agents as groypers. Young groypers often make effigies to Charlie Kirk from the debris in their nest. #ICEfacts

Can't even drive trans anymore. Kansas really embracing that flyover state mentality.

Kinda feel like that would backfire so quickly. These are white men in positions of power who then claim they've been reverse racismed and they're the actual vulnerable victims.

"No taxation without pedophile incarceration" is a strong contender for protest sign of the year.

Oz about as useful as a wizard from Oz just standing there not knowing what to do with himself.

The amount of bullshit you need to peddle to be able to put a pedophile in charge of the presidency is immense and includes telling parents to not vaccinate their kids and making this graph possible. Half of the cases of all of last year in 2 months. Thanks, Tromp.

Cuddles Love GIF ALT: Cuddles Love GIF

Red pandas play every day for the opportunity to hunt down stragglers from ICE agent herds. Their completely innocent track record makes red pandas the predators ICE fears most as they are impossible to arrest. #ICEfacts

This is the schoolyard equivalent of the bully telling the teacher to make him give the lunch money back.

🤣🤣

The first known historical documentation of a wild ICE agent is from fairy tales as the troll under the bridge. #ICEfacts

And we the consumers will never see a freakin frackin cent of it back.

ICE agents order pineapples with pizza on them. #ICEfacts

Who will mentor me in dark money then??? 🥺🥺🥺

As an epileptic Tom Waits fan, this hits just right. Accurate af.

20 years ago I learned one of the most important rules of the internet: don't give out your personal information.

Now in 2025 with identity verification crusades, this rule is more important than ever.

Uncle Jeffy Tiedrich says today in his newsletter:

"Here’s one sure way you can tell you’re living in a shithole country: when the following two headlines appear one after another."

He disrespects our service members to their face and gets away with it. It's beyond sickening. Reporters need to be more scathing with their questions. We need more boos when he tries to speak at military events. The disapproval is definitely more widespread than it appears.

These AI companies have not read Bradbury or Asimov and it shows.

Precisely this. OP is off their rocker.

DoJ cases against protesters keep collapsing as officers’ lies are exposed in court String of embarrassing defeats for prosecutors as experts condemn DoJ effort to cast people as ‘violent perpetrators’

"In Chicago, of 92 people arrested for assaulting or impeding officers last fall, 74 cases have resulted in no charges; in 13 cases, charges were filed and dismissed; and five charged cases were still pending. . . there have been no convictions.

www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

An ICE agent's pupils can dilate up to 200% of the size of their iris. They unfortunately still cannot see color with their vision even when fully dilated. #ICEfacts

I think that might be because... *CHECKS NOTES* Because fuck ICE.

The inventor of motion activated sinks definitely never washed his hands.

Pretty sure the next generation's "6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon" is gonna be "6 Degrees of the Epstein Files."

Community meme: I CAN EXCUSE FASCISM. BUTI DRAW THE LINE AT MERCANTILISM.

The Supreme Court:

Mayfly On the way back to the city after the long weekend, we stop off by prior agreement at the Mayfly, arrange ourselves like collapsing parachutists. Last of the nectar days, hind-end of the country, the afternoon readying itself to make excuses and leave us to our unslept dishevelment. Some nameless river goes by; the sun makes brilliant hoops from tarnished glasses. Half-picked bones; soporific bluebottles. To have to leave this for the road's demands, the mercy of one last round not enough to delay us where people live their whole lives, most likely, watch this cherry tree convulse into winter, what, seventy times maybe.

Declan Ryan

america really is the world’s police they’re fueled by cocaine and run by the mob