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The Vampire Cheese

@mxhemlock

high and hard femme | vampire enthusiast | glitter & bad taste | has fashion feelings | queer kinkster | sex nerd profile pic by @theirdandelion.bsky.social

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07.02.2024
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Latest posts by The Vampire Cheese @mxhemlock

Text from a file in Pokemon Pokopia starting with "CDs are cool little gadgets used by out great-great-grandparents to listen to all their favorite music."

Text from a file in Pokemon Pokopia starting with "CDs are cool little gadgets used by out great-great-grandparents to listen to all their favorite music."

pokopia is sending me with this

06.03.2026 19:43 πŸ‘ 411 πŸ” 152 πŸ’¬ 7 πŸ“Œ 6
Preview
THE BRIDE! Review: The Wildest (and Best) Frankenstein Film In Years Maggie Gyllenhaal's mad monster remix delivers a modern classic.

Maggie Gyllenhaal's mad monster remix delivers a modern classic.

04.03.2026 20:02 πŸ‘ 71 πŸ” 21 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 8

Hard same, I know it's a marketing gimmick (I hope like most marketing gimmicks all this booktok shit evaporates in the cleansing light of day) but the "tropes checklist" is one of the worst things to happen to the public's relationship to books, every time I see it I feel the call of violence

04.03.2026 22:16 πŸ‘ 306 πŸ” 68 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0
a black and white edit that reads "the future includes trans people". around the text is a floral pattern. the image is grainy

a black and white edit that reads "the future includes trans people". around the text is a floral pattern. the image is grainy

the future is for trans people

04.03.2026 21:02 πŸ‘ 7470 πŸ” 2860 πŸ’¬ 25 πŸ“Œ 18

When someone says β€žScientists do not want you to knowβ€œ you can dismiss everything from there on. Scientists want you to know. They are desperate that you know. They can’t shut up about what they found out and want you to know.

03.03.2026 12:10 πŸ‘ 9441 πŸ” 4104 πŸ’¬ 77 πŸ“Œ 164

The contrast of spending last night at a queer indie porn film fest ran by local swers to going to the cpa international women's day breakfast this morning was absolutely wild. Also, very on brand for me.

04.03.2026 03:43 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
Sex Workers Versus the Algorithm No seriously, fuck the algorithm.

Credit card companies are making sex workers' lives worse and worse.

www.theflytrapmedia.com/sex-wor/

03.03.2026 19:41 πŸ‘ 46 πŸ” 28 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

One of the many great things about living with my best friend is she'll make sure we throw a lovely party even when I'm kinda to burnt out to think about it. Then I get to just stay in my house and enjoy the company of my wonderful friends.

02.03.2026 08:50 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Please do! It will make Gran's day I'm sure

02.03.2026 05:51 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

It’s funny if you call PayPal or visa lines and bring this up asking why they claim β€œadult illustrations” is against their regulations but betting on the death of kids is totally fine. They don’t have an answer.

In fact yall should call them at least once a day with this :)

01.03.2026 22:52 πŸ‘ 9317 πŸ” 5435 πŸ’¬ 18 πŸ“Œ 3

Oh this will be fun!

02.03.2026 05:48 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
Post image

Nothing says "It's Mardi Gras time" like a drag queen in a giant wig topped with a party hat she picked up at the reject shop on the way to the gig... love it

28.02.2026 08:37 πŸ‘ 5 πŸ” 3 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

it's 2026 and the cool S is still not in unicode

28.02.2026 06:07 πŸ‘ 632 πŸ” 143 πŸ’¬ 15 πŸ“Œ 3

Anthropic trained their model on a zillion stolen science fiction books all saying "This is why you shouldn't invent the Torment Nexus" so I'm not entirely we should hand it to them for not tormenting the nexus.

27.02.2026 23:49 πŸ‘ 148 πŸ” 33 πŸ’¬ 4 πŸ“Œ 0

Like don't get me wrong, I am good at my job, but the added bonus of being able to repair internal relationships and rebrand the finance team at the same time is a huge draw.

27.02.2026 03:02 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Personality hire is a dumb internet thing BUT I am accutely aware the fact I have bright hair, an eccentric fashion sense & an extroverted personality while working in Finance is why I get hired.

27.02.2026 03:00 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I'm so hyped for this!

25.02.2026 08:27 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

It happened again today

25.02.2026 05:15 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

In this world I am forced to use the Office gifs when I really want to be using gifs from Utopia (the Australia sitcom about working in a gov department)

25.02.2026 00:51 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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More from the first elected official with Tourette Syndrome on BAFTA, Pt. 2:

We've heard from John Davidson, but BAFTA failed before and after the incident.

More: youtu.be/FgaqKIxS4Hs

24.02.2026 00:55 πŸ‘ 933 πŸ” 267 πŸ’¬ 18 πŸ“Œ 9
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As a Black man with Tourette Syndrome, the Public Advocate has some thoughts on BAFTA, Pt. 1:

Hear about his experience with Coprolalia, his thoughts on how BAFTA mishandled the moment, and the need for care for all who are harmed:

Full video: youtu.be/FgaqKIxS4Hs

24.02.2026 00:48 πŸ‘ 1729 πŸ” 728 πŸ’¬ 19 πŸ“Œ 72

If one more male accountant tells me how they crammed all their CPA/CA study into the week before the exam, I will cram them into an oven.

24.02.2026 10:36 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

i posted this before you arrived, hemlock! otherwise i would have said "there's only leather pups here AND one latex barbie-doll vampire"

23.02.2026 05:42 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I guess this is acceptable 🀨

23.02.2026 06:03 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Just because I was dressed in all pink doesnt mean I stop being a Vampire!

23.02.2026 05:37 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Studying Corporate Governance really makes you wonder if maybe the share market is the problem?

23.02.2026 05:34 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Oh no wait I also send teams messages no one reads.

23.02.2026 03:02 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Today, like most days, I am cursed to send emails no one reads.

23.02.2026 02:42 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Yay! It must be nice to have that done and sorted.

19.02.2026 12:40 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Kids today don't know that zydrate comes in a little glass vial

19.02.2026 09:06 πŸ‘ 327 πŸ” 128 πŸ’¬ 27 πŸ“Œ 6