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11.03.2026 03:03
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*Bilwise sits in the HR office*
Yes, the exploding darts may have been over the line but without my tigers do you have any idea how many unnecessary meetings I'd get dragged into?
Today is the most Monday of Mondays.
*adds barbed wire to growing deterrence zone outside of his office*
🧱 😠🧱
General: In terms we'd all understand, what is our disaster probability timeline?
Scientist: more than a Friedman but less than a Kluwe.
General: Damnit!
THREAD: I got laid off from NYMag/Vulture after 14 years. The family lost 75% of income + medical. Now mzs.press bookstore, once a side project. is do-or-die for Judith & I. I feel weird telling you this because others are doing much worse. But if you could like or share this, we'd be so grateful!
*spots the snack signal*
*puts on cape and cowl*
🍲 🍷
Threads thread: thriller_instinct 3d Is it okay to bully 40 and 50 year olds who are on social media just for being on it, cuz like why are you here - 254 Q 3.1K G 28 746 corporateash 18h ••• My ICQ UIN is 7231680. That number is burned into my consciousness. I inadvertently learned that you could see private conversations in public chat rooms when using Telnet instead of a browser on GeoCities. I can tell you the difference in audible dial-up handshakes between 1200, 2400, 14.4 kbps modems. I needed a edu email address to join Facebook after my university was admitted. We were here at the beginning. We made social media. You wouldn't be in my Top 8. I have usernames older than you. 852 Q62 G6 72
“I have usernames older than you.”.
Holy shit
🙁
🍻
Please choose your PTO type:
- Doctors appointment
- Sick time
- Jury duty
✅ Fell omen
- Vacation
True 🥪 🍟
Yeah, it's next to the place where I'm getting my car worked on. Was kinda surprised myself.
I’m an introvert. I honestly look forward to the weekend just so I can stay home again. I’ll be in my comfy clothes, wrapped up in cozy blankets, watching TV, eating my favorite snacks, and enjoying the peace and quiet
Arby's for lunch.
It was very ... Arby's.
Was this after getting them to wreck their ship on the rocks through song?
😜
Yeah, was going to say I can recall the term being used as far back as Desert Storm. Not as frequent as soldier, sailor, etc.
🚨BILWISE STATUS UPDATE 🚨
The televisions in the car appointment waiting room are off. Repeat: the televisions in the car appointment waiting room are off. I will be able to keep thoughts in my head.
Prepare for witty replies and internet banter.
Yeah, or just my usual awkward babbling.
😝
Day off. Dentist, then car work, then free time.
😒⌚
Genie: What is your final wish?
Boy: I wish I were you.
Genue: Weurd but alrught.
😝
(Seen on Reddit)
*Hobbit salute*
🌯🍕☕🍲🌮🎂
And speech writers who cut their teeth on Barrens Chat.
🙄
#BoopsNotBorksOrBapBapBaps
Yes, I considered shortening the hash tag but by the end I felt committed to the bit.
😜
The unbearable lightness of being (without sunbeams)
🎻
Weather technology provides ample time to prepare for big storms like the one expected in New England today and tomorrow. This saves lives. If you are in a vulnerable area it's still not too late to prepare so you are not caught off guard. Stay safe out there!
www.cnn.com/webview/weat...
Such a cool find! Thank you!
🍻
This is a fascinating Sunday morning entertainment. I’m ok (albeit getting slower and slower) until about 1200, when it gets away from me entirely.
Penitent: forgive me father, for I have sinned ... (Lists a bunch of 'sins')
Priest AI: What great sins! Here are some popular penances for them...
This is good and worth reading.
#TeamToad
