Miriam/Markus (she/her, he/him, ze/hir)

Define human consciousness. Oh you can't do that? That means my website has a personality by default

omg, nailed

"Joined Nov '24" badge from that person's profile

Every time.

Chelle @blueallylove.bsky.social: The participation trophy generation needs to grow a fucking backbone. The world does not cater to you. I don't owe you shit. There is zero reason I should worsen my own health because of your virtue signaling. Don't like no alt-text? Add some and shut the fuck up.

For your blocking consideration, ableist asshole @blueallylove.bsky.social, who responds thusly to a perfectly polite request to use alt-text in their posts.

Note, please, the use of "ally" in the user name.

With friends like these dot dot dot

I cannot overstate just how bad that formula is. Calling it chalky would be an insult to chalk. It's more like trying to use pencil shavings on your eyelids.
I do not understand how those things are even still on the market, let alone why they would warrant that outrageous price.

The only piece of "luxury" make-up I've ever owned was one of those Dior 5 pan eyeshadow palettes. My mother got one as a gift, and because she doesn't wear eye make-up, she passed it on to me.

It was, by a wide margin, the worst product I have ever used.

And I just found out they retail at 76€.

Designer brands are such a scam.

“This AI is alive!!!” No it’s not. Call your parents. Have them apologize to society for raising you to be a dim witted piece of shit.

Every single person going hard for AI is either a boss, a bootlicker, a Nazi, or was kicked in the head by a horse.

Testicular sounds like an app to help you get better at taking tests

3 little brown bats, two adults with a baby in between them, hanging on the edge of a cave. The full moon and sky are above them

Little brown bat family 🦇
#littlebrownbat #microbats #bat #animalart #SciArt

When You were partying

I drank from the HOSE

When you were having premarital sex

I drank from the HOSE

While you wasted your days at the gym in pursuit of vanity

I drank from the HOSE

And now that the world is on fire and you're thirsty you have the audacity to come to me for help?

I'm not saying that the self-check-out system at my local drugstore has been subsidizing my lifestyle, but I am using some pretty nice skin care these days...

You know what's wild? Stores that lock some of the products behind glass to prevent theft, but also have self-check-out.

Damn me, but all things are queer

men love to be like ‘if i saw some guy doing that shit to my girl i’d kill him.’ no you wouldn’t lol. you can’t even politely ask your buddy to stop calling women fat bitches or whatever

Why did they call it French toast and not Gallic bread

until act three the shark in Jaws doesn't even know people are mad at him. he's just hanging out

put trees everywhere I am no longer asking

I can never walk past a sugar maple without saying I’d tap that

Me pot o’ gold is a pile o’ shite
-self deprechaun

Terminator-themed drag king name: Al Biebek

Liberals: we will do literally anything and run literally anyone to entice swing voters Leftists: we're swing voters, we'll swing your way if you run someone we like Liberals: fuck off, we want the REAL swing voters: belligerent racists who hate us

AI research:

Researcher: Claude, please eat ten hamburgers.

Claude: Done! I have eaten ten hamburgers. The first two were delicious, but after that I began to experience bloating and the meat sweats.

Headline: Anthropic Says Claude has "A Fully Developed Digestive System"

Italy's equivalent of arm candy is elbow macaroni.

check out this idea - star trek III: the search for cock

keep seeing folks say america is "controlled by israel" america is funding them and is acting under american imperialism
when you frame it as *us* being controlled by *them* you're obfuscating blame that should be directed towards structures of power here

I still like the name Matthias (and the idea of going by Matt), but I don't feel like I *look* like a Matthias. I am giving off Markus vibes, though (I think).
Also, when I legally change my name, I'll probably hyphenate, and Miriam-Markus rolls off the tongue much better than Miriam-Matthias.

When I decided to pick out a masc name, I initially decided on Matthias, which is what my parents would have named me if I had been AMAB.
I eventually switched to Markus because a boy named Markus was Baby's First Gender Envy for me, and because it's a biblical name, matching my birth name.

A poem written in black marker on a wall. In order forme to write poetry that isn't political I must listen to the birds And in order to hear the birds not The Warplanes must Be Silent. Marwan Markhoul