byelilo

Your outdated pop music references are killing me softly

if I knew how depressed I was going to be, I would have started much sooner

I harbour an unreasonable amount of resentment towards things that can crawl under rocks.

it’s illegal to annoy me

of all the motives i think my favorite is ulterior

my cup size? reese's

*helps hamburger as a friend*

First protein cigarette will go hard

how quickly do thin mints start working? i just ate a whole sleeve

here’s the thing
*totally not the thing*

Live, laugh, hey that was my last beer.

this meeting could’ve been an x-files standalone episode

mac n cheese for one (the vibes are heavy with grief, not self indulgent)

Don't make me do it (press the button that says restore 68 tabs)

Reading through my posts and diagnosing myself as wifeable material

it's just a little dart frog toxin bro don't be such a baby

*shows up to the drug deal with kohl’s cash*

[pausing sex] do u want a caprisun

Shut up Dad you’ve never had to pick a reel to break no contact with you don’t know anything

Stop saying “hurt people hurt people” around me because I just hear a command twice

asking the waiter for his number and then texting him “can i have a refill” two minutes later

the pipi longstocking cinematic universe when

I think it’s very sexy of me to still move with love in a world like this

we have to be able to come here and be stupid we can’t just be sad

not falling for this 2016 trend, nice try fed!!!

i stare at the moon the way you people stare at feet

siri am i a meangirl online

does this not embarrassing them at all

How many vanilla chapsticks can you eat per week