Barba Papa 🏳️‍🌈 The Bear Did Lady

Has your cocaine been spiked with chili? Call our hot line.

We're all adults here at this casino, we can call it a shits table

I switched to Qobuz too, and am mostly very happy about it.

If you ever venture in, I recommend the Decline Press.

Optimist: the cup is half full

Pessimist: the cup of half empty

Optimus Prime: watch out the cup is a Decepticon

A toast to rebaking bread!

*a nuclear blast destroys all i hold dear but that one vertebrae in my spine finally cracks so at least i die happy*

Did they invent a back that doesn't hurt yet?

I read it years ago, and immediately recognised it from the title.

I'm picturing one of those ways now, and it is delighting me.

Today I get to be a shirtlifter in socially approved way. I have to go to a shop and collect a shirt that I ordered.

In honour of the FLOTUS, the incoming replacement for Kristi Noem will rebrand DHS as the Department of Ho-land Security.

Do you know what his motivation is? Pride? Gossip? Bragging?

I would love that! But I moved back to Scotland two years ago. I know London well because I lived there for most of my adult life.

Not for me. I need a lot of lube and a lot of reassurance before I'll attempt to rectify anything.

Greenwich foot tunnel has some charm, and Greenwich is worth a visit anyway. The Cutty Sark, the Royal Observatory, the Military Hospital, the market. Some beautiful buildings, oozing with history. Also, you have the option of using a river boat to get there and/or back.

What do you call a guy hanging on your wall?

Art

What do you call two guys hanging out of a window?

Curt and Rod

Apply for a free ticket to the Sky Garden. Or take yourself for a tour of the Barbican Centre.

Not just any old rigorous anal, but rigorous anal from the BBC

if they make you block your friends, you might be in a cult. if you blindly obey, you’re right where you belong.

A social media app where people are limited to only post “Hey! Look at me!” They can only comment, “Also, look at me!” Favorites are called “I looked at this!” and reposts are called “Hey! Look at this!”

"Oh, I'm so wet! It should make me feel clean, but I feel.... dirty."

If you are a little bit of a curmudgeon, you are permitted to describe yourself as a cursmidgeon.

😁

It was interesting to hear about my new friend from someone who has known him far longer, and to have my early perceptions mostly validated. It seems his peer group also recognise that he is wise beyond his years, grounded, and thoroughly decent.

Very disappointing that there isn't an optional instruction set called Argonauts.

In my experience it usually takes ages to get this kind of thing sorted.

This lad came round the next day, diagnosed the issue, got me to order some parts, and said to message once I had them. The order went in yesterday, I picked up the parts this morning, he came back today. All done.

My new young friend is a painter and decorator. Since people in one trade often know people in other trades, I asked him if he could recommend a plumber. He did.

That’s some real nice oil your country’s got there, it’d be a real shame if your heads of state were declared a terrorist organization.