I just saw a man without a nose walk by, drinking a coffee, and the first thought I had was, “I’ll bet that’s convenient.”

This is Abner. He’d like to show you his fish.

Simply trying to come up with a new email address has gone from an existential crisis into full task paralysis. What do I do.

My kid gave me a sticker from shark week. Fam, what’s going on, here?

You didn’t inherit your family‘s “temper,” you inherited their generational trauma. Sort yourself out.

He leaves me the best goodies

He leaves me the best goodies

I’m using pierogis as croutons today and don’t you judge me

How do you keep from feeling like a failure with a garbage product when you’re rejected from a juried exhibition asking for a friend

Here you go. This is for you.

El Capitan displays a massive American flag upside down—the traditional signal of distress or extreme emergency.

A democracy exists whenever those who are free and are not well-off, being in the majority, are in sovereign control of government, an oligarchy when control lies with the rich and better-born, these being few.

Aristotle

I’m a millennial and I’ve heard it said that my generation doesn’t feel grown-up because we aren’t financially secure homeowners. I disagree; it’s because we lack the burden of approval that our predecessors had. My mother never would have dyed her blue and eaten a discount turnover for dinner.

That’s so fun lookin 😍

I am mentally stressed and physically sore so I snuck down to my husband‘s liquor supply only to find Bols blue curaçao and 2 ounces of ginger brandy wtf

I just burned myself and stuck it in the quench tank. Imma be a superhero or maybe not. If not, it’s been fun lol

All im sayin is don’t ever isolate my vocals from anything.

I know I didn’t conjugate, but I’m out of my abilities in this conversation already.

No absoluto, hombre. Denegar, Defender, Deponer.

Lo siento, amigos. ¿Como se dice? “Lo siento por mí pais.” Te quiero aquí.

All of my animal sculptures for the next 4 years will be screaming and I will not be elaborating.

For those saying it wasn't a Nazi salute.

Keep posting it. Keep sharing it.

@nerdork.bsky.social dropped a video to the Leon apologists referring to him as, “auchwistic” and I AM DEADD

Great idea! Thanks.

I’d rather watch a Minecraft live than the inauguration. Keep it going.

I can’t explain it but getting back on TikTok after the ban is like working a full day then walking back into your apartment that smells like sex. Like what was going on in there while I was gone?