Odd News

Someone Stole Tucker Carlson’s Non-Woke Nicotine Pouches Millions of dollars worth of nicotine pouches have disappeared into zyn air.

Millions of dollars worth of nicotine pouches have disappeared into zyn air.

#FoxNews #nicotine #PhilipMorris #thefts #tobacco #TuckerCarlson #OddNews

Rep. Gonzales Admits “Lapse in Judgment” With Aide Who Lit Herself on Fire Also claims God has forgiven him. God, as usual, was unavailable for comment.

Also claims God has forgiven him. God, as usual, was unavailable for comment.

#affair #ethics #government #marriage #suicide #OddNews

New Jersey Girl Scouts Achieve What Economists Call “Perfect Market Conditions” Outside Cannabis Dispensary The “munchies supply chain” achieves full vertical integration in a Mount Laurel parking lot.

The “munchies supply chain” achieves full vertical integration in a Mount Laurel parking lot.

#cannabis #cookies #dispensary #girlscoutcookie #newjersey #OddNews

Palantir Provides Nicotene Pouches to Workers To Boost Productivity Because nothing says “surveillance-tech contractor” like getting your workforce chemically dependent on company property.

Because nothing says "surveillance-tech contractor" like getting your workforce chemically dependent on company property.

#caffeine #nicotine #office #pantir #productivity #work #OddNews

Hundreds of Active-Duty Military Report Their Superiors Are Too Enthusiastic About Ending the World Turns out “chain of command” now includes someone who lives in the sky and hasn’t filed paperwork since 33 A.D.

Turns out “chain of command” now includes someone who lives in the sky and hasn’t filed paperwork since 33 A.D.

#Armageddon #God #iran #military #religion #war #OddNews

Billy Idol Credits Crack Cocaine With Curing His Heroin Addiction The ’80s rocker has a new documentary, a sobriety-adjacent lifestyle, and the most unhinged recovery story since Keith Richards changed his own blood.

The '80s rocker has a new documentary, a sobriety-adjacent lifestyle, and the most unhinged recovery story since Keith Richards changed his own blood.

#addiction #billyidol #cocaine #heroin #musician #punk #rock #OddNews

Komodo Dragon Chows Down On Stuffed Animals Because why hug a stuffed animal when you can stuff yourself with one or two?

Because why hug a stuffed animal when you can stuff yourself with one or two?

#japanesemacaque #komododragon #PunchTheMonkey #singapore #stuffedanimals #surgery #zoo #OddNews

Vatican Exorcism School Adds AI Module to Annual Demon-Fighting Curriculum Participants will also hear from a woman who became possessed and started speaking Arabic, which exorcists say is less common than Latin but still gets you flagged at airports…

Participants will also hear from a woman who became possessed and started speaking Arabic, which exorcists say is less common than Latin but still gets you flagged at airports

#AI #catholicchurch #catholicism #exorcism #priest #vatican #OddNews

US Middle East Evacuation Hotline Leads To Unhelpful Information Press 1 for evacuation, press 2 for existential dread, press 3 to enjoy the soothing sound of government hold music.

Press 1 for evacuation, press 2 for existential dread, press 3 to enjoy the soothing sound of government hold music.

#evacuation #Hotline #iran #USCitizens #war #OddNews

Buc-ee’s, Whose Logo Has a Beaver on a Yellow Circle, Sues Mickey’s, Whose Logo Has a Moose on a Red Hexagon Buc-ee’s claims customers cannot tell the difference between a beaver and a moose, which says more about their customers and Ohio than anything else.

Buc-ee’s claims customers cannot tell the difference between a beaver and a moose, which says more about their customers and Ohio than anything else.

#beavers #bucees #lawsuit #logo #mickeys #Moose #Ohio #trademark #OddNews

War Scores Well With DC Pizza Lovers Because while politicians may be war-hungry, you can’t subsist on war alone.

Because while politicians may be war-hungry, you can’t subsist on war alone.

#iran #OperationEpicFury #PENTAGON #pentagonpizzareport #pizza #war #washingtondc

Microsoft Bans the Word “Microslop”, Inadvertently Creates a Viral Marketing Campaign One forbidden nickname, infinite screenshots, and absolutely zero chill.

One forbidden nickname, infinite screenshots, and absolutely zero chill.

#AI #copilot #discord #microslop #Microsoft #OddNews

Florida Man Uses Taco Season and Pokemon Cards to Pioneer All-New Gateway Felony Strategy When life gives you cumin, apparently you build a black-market Charizard empire.

When life gives you cumin, apparently you build a black-market Charizard empire.

#eBay #pokemon #police #tacos #target #thefts #OddNews

Fish Sticks Are Funding Russia’s War on Ukraine. And You Should Feel Bad The frozen food aisle has entered its Cold War era, and your air fryer is now complicit.

The frozen food aisle has entered its Cold War era, and your air fryer is now complicit.

#China #fish #fishsticks #import #russia #ukraine #war #OddNews

Liquid Death, Spotify Team up for Cremation Urn Speaker Because why stop torturing someone with bad music when they die?

Because why stop torturing someone with bad music when they die?

#bluetoothspeaker #death #Gimmick #liquiddeath #speaker #Spotify #water #OddNews

Florida Man Attempts To Invade Cuba In a bold attempt to reboot the Bay of Pigs franchise, Florida Man brings assault rifles, Molotov cocktails, and zero adult supervision.

In a bold attempt to reboot the Bay of Pigs franchise, Florida Man brings assault rifles, Molotov cocktails, and zero adult supervision.

#Cuba #florida #FloridaMan #invasion #OddNews

Chocolate Funding Gang Activity in the UK It’s a sweet, nougaty, chocolatey crime of opportunity.

It's a sweet, nougaty, chocolatey crime of opportunity.

#BritishRetailConsortium #cadbury #chocolate #gang #Sainsbury #shoplifting #stolen #Tesco #unitedkingdom #OddNews

AI Models Keep Nuking Everything in War Games When given 27 choices, they picked “apocalypse” as if it were a preset.

When given 27 choices, they picked “apocalypse” as if it were a preset.

#AI #Armageddon #grok #humanity #nuclearwar #simulation #war #wargames #OddNews

Garbage Time: Italian Man Illegally Trained Dog To Take Out Trash, Police Say It’s a dirty job, but someone’s pet has to do it.

It's a dirty job, but someone's pet has to do it.

#dog #garbage #italy #training #trash #work #OddNews

Bow Down to Your Robot Vacuum Overlords Software engineer asks AI to help him play with his vacuum, and is immediately promoted to surveillance commander of a robot army currently deployed in 7,000 homes across 24 nations.

Software engineer asks AI to help him play with his vacuum, and is immediately promoted to surveillance commander of a robot army currently deployed in 7,000 homes across 24 nations.

#Claude #dog #home #network #spy #vacuum #OddNews

How Viral Slop Reanimated the USS Ford Toilet Crisis A weeks-old story about the USS Ford’s plumbing goes viral again after passing through the internet’s own sewage system, arriving on the other end unrecognizable and smelling much worse.

A weeks-old story about the USS Ford's plumbing goes viral again after passing through the internet's own sewage system, arriving on the other end unrecognizable and smelling much worse.

#navy #npr #plumbing #ship #slop #toilet #OddNews

Kid Rock Invokes Divine Retribution on Media for Reporting $5,000 Ticket Prices Then immediately confirms the pricing.

Then immediately confirms the pricing.

#concert #God #kidrock #RFKjr #ticketprices #OddNews

Defense Secretary Reveals Classified Anti-Pizza Strategy Live on Television In a bold counterintelligence move, the Joint Chiefs have declared war on late-night delivery drivers.

In a bold counterintelligence move, the Joint Chiefs have declared war on late-night delivery drivers.

#defense #delivery #government #military #Pentagon #pizza #usa #OddNews

Canadian Man Celebrates Olympic Loss by Taking a Chainsaw to His TV Nation whose entire cultural identity rests on one sport loses to a country that ranked that sport somewhere behind cornhole but ahead of soccer.

Nation whose entire cultural identity rests on one sport loses to a country that ranked that sport somewhere behind cornhole but ahead of soccer.

#canada #chainsaw #hockey #Olympics #usa #winterolympics #OddNews

Study Recommends Changing Your Underwear Every Six Months Finally, science catches up to what the rest of us have been doing since college.

Finally, science catches up to what the rest of us have been doing since college.

#boxers #clean #laundry #underwear #washing #OddNews

Ukraine Hits Russian Target 800 Miles Away With New Homemade Cruise Missile Built From Airplane Scrap When your war machine becomes its own parts supplier, that’s less a setback and more a very awkward recycling program.

When your war machine becomes its own parts supplier, that’s less a setback and more a very awkward recycling program.

#factory #missle #russia #ukraine #war #OddNews

America’s Newest Metal Frontman: William Shatner Rock out with your Spock out.

Rock out with your Spock out.

#blacklabelsociety #chrispoland #heavymetal #ironmaiden #judaspriest #nuclearmessiah #ozzyosbourne #rock #williamshatner #zakkwylde #OddNews

Denmark Refuses To Participate in Global Sex Recession, Cites “Vibes” Turns out free tuition, private apartments, and government-approved horniness is a surprisingly potent cocktail.

Turns out free tuition, private apartments, and government-approved horniness is a surprisingly potent cocktail.

#denmark #health #sex #study #swimming #OddNews

Study Finds Ultra-Processed Foods Engineered Like Cigarettes To Maximize Addiction University of Michigan study says blaming yourself for eating the whole bag ignores that the bag was specifically designed to make you eat the whole bag.

University of Michigan study says blaming yourself for eating the whole bag ignores that the bag was specifically designed to make you eat the whole bag.

#addiction #food #health #obesity #study #tobacco #OddNews

Dog Breaks Cross-Country Skiing Record at Winter Olympics He finished well in front of the Irish (Setters) the German (Shepherds) and the Afghans.

He finished well in front of the Irish (Setters) the German (Shepherds) and the Afghans.

#crosscountryskiing #dog #nazgul #Olympics #tenahadzic #winterolympics #OddNews