Princess Pancakes

The post office is issuing commemorative tramp stamps.

tech bro is short for technically broken

Goddammit I think I just heard the Jumanji drums.

Daaammmn girl, how did you squeeze all that crazy into one fine ass package?

christian bale: i am batman

christian braille: ⠊ ⠁⠍ ⠃⠁⠞⠍⠁⠝

just won an oscar for best lighting in a teams meeting

i woke up today and chose violets

They have those here?👀

my signature move is not moving. for like hours.

A family of four splitgill mushrooms grow from the side of a fallen branch, upturned to see their radiating double-gills All photos by me

Here are some nice mushrooms

Your email finds me eating shredded parmesan with a fork

All panties are edible if you love her enough.

Thank you!

👀

y’all told me i was crazy when i downloaded all of tiktok and put it on blu-rays but who’s laughing now

Forehead kisses ward off nightmares, everyone knows this.

Hello, Bluesky. I’m here because TikTok and I had a complicated breakup. Let’s just say I’m a sad, wandering content refugee looking for new laughs and chaos.

but where will the other social media platforms get content

Choas is my middle name. They call me PCP 😂

a man talking to another man with the words " i 'm not sure what to do with my hands " visible ALT: a man talking to another man with the words " i 'm not sure what to do with my hands " visible

Me rn about TikTok

Nothing says modern romance like watching TikToks on FaceTime with your bf until the very last scroll. The shared laughs, the mutual cringe, and the synchronized doomscroll—it’s what Shakespeare would’ve written about if he had Wi-Fi. 💕

hey baby let's make some covalent bonds

Chipotle mayo could bring this country together

smoking that good shit 😮‍💨

(i’m high on anxiety)

The real triumph here is that I thought of a skeet in the night, went back to sleep & still remembered it when I woke up.