Woodrow Phoenix

Mysterious style, could catch on

Enjoy the restful silence, I say. Have a snooze

Congratulations

Yep. Didn’t see any. But did see a young woman carrying one a few days ago near Piccadilly Circus

ooh, house of secrets

You don’t want life in your cavities so that’s ok

I will stay alert for new sightings, this I swear

MORE LIES

The evidence is on your side, definitely

Someone in my neighbourhood drives around in a near-perfect MYSTERY MACHINE-styled VW. I only ever see it parked in various locations. One day I will see who owns it and we will become friends and solve crimes together

Yes. Dammit.

Yes. Pandas are the Handmaidens of Liars and Hornswogglers, that’s what my childhood experience taught me

All I could taste in Jolt was extra sugar, which admittedly wasn’t a dealbreaker for me… but it was kinda boring. I did not detect any extra powers from the caffeine, felt swindled again

same

ALL NATURAL, my eye

We didn’t have that in the UK!

Jack. It’s THE WORST. It blighted my childhood! So many parents thinking it was perfectly good at children’s birthday parties because it had a furry animal on the label and was therefore more ‘natural’ and better for you :(

Fat-Free Half-and-Half?! Is that the homeopathic version?

I bet he did: Vindication!
In my Dad’s case I had to prove to him that I could taste the difference between Cheap Substitute and Branded Item (even he could taste how terrible Panda Cola was) and then he relented

Wonder how long it took them to come up that one

My dad was more of a ‘buy the cheapest analogue for whatever it is the children like’ kind of shopper. Panda Cola instead of Coke, Sugar Snaps instead of Frosties and my howls of outrage were as naught

I am particularly curious about whether that distinctive Jarritos juciness is still there. Colour looks identical…

there’s no mistaking which is which, and that’s important when you’re shopping

This is what I like to see!

I need this

I think that’s the fate of all artists of public renown, to be reduced to props.

Andy Warhol: wig, soup
Chris Ofili: elephant poo
David Hockney: specs, crayons
Picasso: shirtless, wonky faces
Tracey Emin: messy bed
Dali: moustache, bendy clock
etc

Spanish PM Pedro Sánchez on Iran: “Spain is against this disaster. Because we understand that governments are here to improve people's lives, to provide solutions to problems, not to make people's lives worse.

1/2

requiem for vanished birdsong

Hmmmm I ‘ll try one

:D