The worst person you know

The chances I remain awake through the third period of the hockey game are slim and going down by the minute.

I have eaten all the bagels in my house but I still have salmon, which means it is once again time for me to fail at making bagels.

You are the worst 😂

Give it time

Boy don't I know it. Thank you for the tip!

Hold up I am also currently searching for a great grandpa (or so) LeBlanc! What do you know? Wanna DM me?

Note that it is also possible to have incredibly high efficiency and terrible efficacy. If the guy in charge uses 200 nails, all of them attached things, but builds a rocking horse instead of fixing the bridge, that doesn't accomplish the goal.

Measuring input: how many nails did you put in the lumber?

Measuring output: how many of them attached pieces of wood together?

Measuring effectiveness: can I cross the bridge or not?

They're bragging about the first one.

EXCUSE ME PLEASE ADMIRE THIS FLOOFY GOOSE

Surely at some point it becomes cheaper just to use the money on restitution.

Wait, isn't that like several thousand dollars worth of bread?

Well if you ever do decide to visit, you will be cordially invited to huff my taint.

Yeah, I pick that one. I'm not saying the drowning one and the hot poker one don't have their charms, but this feels like the one for me.

Is Thomas volunteering to take over if the meeting's poissonier has an accident? Will he hop on the line if the city manager runs out of his mise en place? Wear normal clothes, you tool.

Even the choice to wear that coat to the hearing feels like the choice of a pompous ass. I bet he'd have something to say if a nurse wore scrubs or a mechanic wore coveralls to his restaurant, why is he wearing chef whites to a town hall meeting?

French Laundry chef again scolds Bay Area town over affordable housing project "I have reached out to every one of you; none of you has reached out to me."

As a cullinarian, I have infinite respect for Thomas Keller as an artist and none as a member of the community. He is incredibly rich, incredibly privileged, and runs his restaurants on unpaid stages. Where are the people you're not paying supposed to live, Thomas?

www.sfgate.com/bayarea/arti...

I would rather spend the night in Pakistan's darkest dungeon than with Kavanaugh, three line cops, and a bag of cocaine.

Jessica is working overtime to invent the actual nightmare blunt rotation.

NY☭ is actually kind of hot when you remove the silly reactionary fear mongering.

This is the one. The universe is cool, the lore is cool, no one needs to see Grandpa Fillion pretending he's still got it. Tell a new story.

So this is how I learn Also Baldwin has a reputation to protect. Curious.

Fucking hell even RFK is parroting this stupid "spiritual warfare" crap.

If you are putting Markwayne Mullin and smart in the same sentence, you are definitionally incorrect. Any information that man has ever learned was forced into his head against his will.

That's table stakes, Doctor.

Sorry boss, I can't work, I'm watching Kristi Noem do a press conference and she doesn't know she's been shitcanned

I wish I didn't know that.

And it lets him avoid tough questions when he only talks to sycophants. You'll notice that press assemblies always come from inside the Oval Office now. That's because he's allowed to choose which reporters are allowed in the Oval, whereas he can't kick tough journalists out of the press room.

Yes. I don't know if it's intentional, but they're clearly doing this thing where they give a million contradictory reasons for what they're doing and let people pick the one they like. It's also why he never does briefings for the assembled press anymore. He doesn't want to stick to a story.

My attitude is that of the character Michael Bolton from Office Space. When asked why he doesn't change his name to avoid being confused with the singer, he says, "Why would I change? He's the one who sucks." Giving up my life just because those other people are assholes isn't in my DNA.

And? Is it good?