❤️‍🔥

ready for my new role as kristi noem’s blanket drugs

jk try to find me now

My unit has done a frank and open self-inventory about that and a harm reduction roadmap is in place for the next amphibious assault.

omg 😭

pitbull and cat

my favorite cartoon is her. but that she has a jaw like a shark and a big square head and just had a seat in the kitchen with her wet nose after breakfast because she wanted to go outside

confetti cheerios

maha doodid it

here is some cheese

a dog is wrapped in a blanket and says `` lets go back to sleep go away tuesday your bugging me ! '' Alt: a dog is wrapped in a blanket and says `` lets go back to sleep go away tuesday your bugging me ! ''

touche, maybe be honest if you’re a dowager empress say that

they think you will spend it on snack :7

*Cookies*

Don’t let today go by without saying I love you to your typo

i got two concussions & i want to understand

don’t start a check your ass can’t cash ~me to myself it’s too earllly

thanks!! 🙏 st ides heaven

ok i’m sixty percent there. how am i sure that this poem is sixty percent done? statistically if it’s not that’s not how this pathology works. so am i sure? ask a doctor

dick measuring contest but percentage of poop that went into the toilet and it starts at all of it

im being forcibly removed
from a federal building for
saying bad things are bad

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the og one. michelle’s kid is ok.

gold for a project. do not under any circumstances let farts get a hold of this.

beach roxanne with sparkly eyes

bonjour

in this economy? my exlax

real! ferns motel. would not

technically difficult study

which reminds me that the pants are aqua

i thought you made it up just now

Saw-whet owl of the northeast/new England looking surprised to have its picture taken while sitting in the trees at night. It is very small and cute.

[pees self] !!! Who dafuck is theeess ?

The reason you don’t see any time travelers around is because they’re all in 1997 eating kudos bars and drinking sobe and listening to Natalie Imbruglia

am i bad for throwing away two pillows

let it roll baby roll (doors)

thanks for reminding me of a type of dude: emergency room doctor with the worst karma, kinda rolls with it, doesn’t wonder why the bad side effects always happen to them or why their car got totaled, has money to get new car