Nyx in Dyx 🔞

Nyx's Commissions ROUGH SKETCH (Draft Sketch) • Base Price (1 character, blank BG): $50 • Extra Characters (up to 2): $50 each • Alts (up to 2): Free REFINED SKETCH (Textured Pencil Line Art) • Base Price (1 character...

I'm taking a week off work this month from the 15th - 21st because I have some friends coming down here from out-of-state. They're only here for 4 days, so once they leave I can work on some of the commissions in my queue. I'm still open for more commission work as well!
forms.gle/db91ZVDMZtRx...

I still feel a bit numb but I'm doing okay. It will take a bit of time to process this experience in a healthy manner, but I'm just relieved that I wasn't met with dismissal or deflection. My ex isn't inherently a bad person, we both did stupid shit and we learn from it. I want the best for them too

Spoke to my ex about the rape I ranted about last night. They expressed regret and remorse for their actions, and apologized. I'm doing better. I know they didn't intend to hurt me, I know it was a mistake, but I think getting that closure and apology is all I really needed. I can breathe again...

I haven't taken my meds yet tonight, maybe I should make a cocktail or two and just take the meds in the morning. I feel like I need a drink.

Anyway sorry for rambling about this, didn't mean to drag anyone's mood down with my evil thoughts. I'm fully aware I'm being petty and I'm sure most people would glance at this thread and think "ah typical woman waiting 10 years to admit she's been raped" or something stupid and dismissive.

Which in all honestly isn't exactly something I should be worried about anyway because it probably won't be long before they're going to struggle and suffer what it's like being an actual adult. They're not very good at being responsible or self-sufficient so maybe they'll get theirs. I feel vile.

I think the only time my rape has actually disturbed me was once during coitus with my current partner, and once or twice during a dream (nightmare). Other than that, I don't really feel much dread about it, I only just feel petty and bitter because I want my ex to be stripped of their successes.

I wouldn't say having been raped completely traumatized me because in all honesty, I was under the impression it was something I deserved for my deceptive actions against my partner, so it was initially ingrained in my mind as a righteous consequence. It took me years to reconsider that though.

I don't wanna just hit them up and be like "hey remember that time you raped me?" because then that doesn't incur an epiphany. I want them to realize this of their own volition. I don't want to hold their hands and lead them through life anymore, I coddled them enough when I was living with them.

I just wish I could get some kind of closure about it. I'm still on speaking terms with them, but I highly doubt they realized they took full advantage of me and my body without my consent at one point. An apology would honestly be all I want, just some acknowledgement that they've done me wrong.

Additionally it was during a troubled period in our relationship where it was falling apart. I often think about how I probably deserved it because I cheated on them repeatedly, wholly due to feeling underappreciated. It's not a valid excuse, but I know there's no excuse for raping someone either.

Sometimes I get disgustingly petty thoughts about publicly calling out my ex partner for the fact they've raped me, but I have no proof, it happened a decade ago, and I don't want to do it when they're popping off and such, because then it'd just seem like I'm conveniently trying to dethrone them.

Had a rough day at work due to how slow business was and it bored me so bad I got depressed, I was also coming down from a caffeine high so I felt desperately in need of a nap. 😞

wolfing down a cold breakfast burrito at nearly 1pm on a freezing Tuesday afternoon because I haven't eaten in a very long time and I am a voracious animal

Nah I get you. I'm always worried about accidentally misrepresenting or stereotyping when it comes to making erotica and kink-related stuff. I know not every character I've drawn is cis, but that's probably because it's all reliant on how clients and supporters want me to depict said character(s).

Cat's character Lyra with a large, gurgling belly. She's wearing a tight-fitting shirt that can't even fit around her breasts, and tiny booty shorts with ripped edges that don't even fit around her butt.

Biiiiig Lyra! Character belongs to @catboymech.art, I drew this as a birthday gift to their partner @cowszers.bsky.social

Fuck, I'm cis and I get misgendered all the time because I'm broad, chubby, deep-voiced, hairy, and my demeanor is not at all "effeminate" by social standards. I would love to be more femme because it's my pref, but there are some masc traits about myself that I wish were represented more in art.

Ya'll are too sweet and kind to me what the hell 😭

Thank you Grinda. I think I'm just mopey because I want to feel like I really belong somewhere. I often get imposter syndrome about my place in the community because I don't exactly feel like it's my domain to roam around in. I'm no vore connoisseur, I'm just a perfectionist with no self-esteem.

I hate that I feel the need to fish for validation and affirmations when I should have the confidence to do that for myself argghhhh

I guess what I'm trying to say is, do my efforts really matter to you as a consumer of my art? Are my attempts at making appealing and arousing fetish material meaningful to you? Do you think my work has any value (not monetarily speaking)? I'm stuck in my own head about this stuff, it's agonizing.

I try really hard to put my best efforts into my artwork because I take it very seriously, I'm just not good at doing a lot of it because it's easy for me to get burnt out drawing stuff that doesn't exactly pique my interest. I don't loathe drawing it, I just wish I had more feedback or reception.

That being said, I feel a strong disconnect with the audience and friends I've made within the community because I lack the interest. It makes me feel like an outsider and in some regards... a fraud. I don't mind appealing to the crowd, I just don't know if it's meaningful to anyone.

I've tried dabbling in vore roleplay before with my boyfriend whenever we were long-distance, but the vore aspects never seem to get to me. I just like the closeness of being able to accommodate and provide a pleasurable experience. I don't do this for anyone else simply because I don't care to.

I know folks have told me before that I'm a welcomed member of the vore community despite my lack of interest, but I feel like that is what makes it hard for me to feel valued. I don't exactly feel like I can relate to how others find my work arousing, I can only hope people appreciate my efforts...

I've been on Zepbound for almost a full month now and have lost about 12lbs. I'm finally under 250lbs which is great progress so far, and I'm looking forward to the continued weight loss.

Since I was a good girl and consumed under 1400 calories today, I ate a cookie as a lil' treat. :3

I guess I'm on voresky now. It seems to be mainly for roleplaying purposes though, so I don't think I'll be using it...
But if you wanna check it out, it's really no different than my bsky account lol
voresky.app/profile/nyxi...

I dunno if I qualify as a "very fat" woman but I recall once playfully chiding my boyfriend about his interest and fixation on chubby, pudgy bodies during intimacy, and it just made him grab and squeeze me way more ahahah

Navel-fucking Nyx's stuffed vore belly

Cat's character Lyra with a large, gurgling belly. She's wearing a tight-fitting shirt that can't even fit around her breasts, and tiny booty shorts with ripped edges that don't even fit around her butt.

Biiiiig Lyra! Character belongs to @catboymech.art, I drew this as a birthday gift to their partner @cowszers.bsky.social