I just saw a large white pickup drive by with its faded Trump flags fluttering, and I locked that visual into my memory. This could be the last time I see such a thing, and I want to remember this moment forever.
Funny memes about the Louvre robbery are all that’s keeping me going right now.
I remember when Prince died and I expressed some sadness on the internet, and people were like, “you’re weird, get over it,” and it didn’t occur to me that I should retaliate by getting them fired.
Yesterday, when JD Vance came to Minneapolis, I got to yell “Shame on you!” at him in person (through layers of bulletproof glass). He might not have noticed, but I’m still riding this high. 10/10 cathartic experience. Would recommend.
Perimenopause: If I hear a cough, if there are too many people at Costco, if a wisp of my own hair tickles my face, it’s all I can do to not to scream and hit something. If people only knew there’s just a thin veil of self-control (and physical exhaustion) protecting them from my imagined violence.
Last night I had a nightmare my family was back living in a townhouse with an HOA and neighbors sharing a wall. Why is my brain being so mean?
Came here to say the same about my Fit. Great little car in every way, except I quickly learned I need to lean forward and then back to check every time I turn. I can’t even count how many times I’ve been startled to find a pedestrian there. 😥
If anyone noticed a women struggling to mow her overgrown boulevard with a little reel mower before the rain this morning, that was me, and yes, I’m still alive, but barely. 😥
You honk at me the second the light turns green? Now I am Granny on her Sunday drive. My car is a rusty jalopy that needs to be coaxed forward. My foot caresses the gas like I’m petting a scared kitten. Why, this road must be made of molasses! I am pettiness personified. You’ll be sorry, Buster.
The song lyric that I most resonate with is from Cake: “she’s touring the facilities and picking up slack.” That’s a mom. You can’t tell me this isn’t about a mom schlepping from room to room, cleaning up after her husband and kids.
This summer, the cool kids are into knee-length jorts, cowboy caviar, Weezer, Arizona Arnold Palmer Lite, and boycotting Target. I’ll update if I gather more intel.
Is there a reason there aren’t pedal pubs for underagers? They could serve soft drinks and the kids could obnoxiously belt out showtunes—at the optimal age for singing and being silly in public. It’s not as cute when drunk 50 year-olds are screaming Sweet Caroline down 1st Avenue.
The TikTok-famous La Scala salad (a.k.a. The Kardashian salad), homemade, with only Aldi ingredients. Tasty, and also a commentary on how we got here and how it’s going.
One thing about adulthood that has been a letdown is the fact that sinks are not self-cleaning. Every time I’ve wiped down a sink in the past 30+ years I’ve been astonished (offended, even) at how something that has constant soap and hot water running through it can get so grimy.
Hunt & Gather (or any vintage store) is a danger zone for both time and money. For instance, do I collage? No. Have I thought seriously about collaging? No. In the last two hours, did I assemble a $60 pile of postcards, magazine pages, and interesting scrap papers to begin my collaging hobby? 🫠
That’s my bird.
In my yard: green and purple things are popping up, it smells earthy and damp, beetles and worms are under everything I move, a robin is sitting on her eggs right outside my window, and I pruned a little tree for the first time today. Snip, snip, snip. I felt like Edward Scissorhands
Friends, I’m going to need reviews of Blackberry Dr. Pepper before I go buy some. I’ve only seen it in a multi-can pack, and that’s too much.
Thrift store find. I can’t figure out if it’s real.
Actually, nevermind. My child hates the shoes because they are green. She knew they were green before I went to pick them up.
Whew. Got the shoes. Come see them in the Washburn HS production of Xanadu!
Waiting for a woman I don’t know to meet me at this Bloomington Lunds/Byerlys with a pair of shoes I am buying off Marketplace. I think I got ghosted.
🎫 🎫 🎫 I've been to 38/53 of Minnesota's essential music venues. How many have you been to? Tally it up and read the Strib's ratings for each here. 🎫 🎫 🎫 www.startribune.com/venues
Wholesome teen story: my 14 year-old was playing online games with her friends this morning and they got bored, so they all decided to clean their respective rooms “together” while still in the group chat. It took 2 hours, and they all had a fun time. Sweet little weirdos. 🥹
I think the craziest thing about this Signal scandal is that by next week there’s gonna be something 10 times worse
I was lucky enough to witness this moment. Congrats! 💜
Stranger on Reddit does not deserve your energy. They have moved on and are harassing other people, hoping to have an interaction that makes them feel something other than self-hatred.
Thank you for getting out there!
I see your shoe/sock game and I approve, Michael Shannon.
