Wiener Water Soup

"But how about these drapes, huh?"

Insightful observation, Pete. And what can we learn about that reaction?

He made up a position for her so she can get a pat on the head and move downstairs to Storage Room B.

"I knew you would punch me back if I punched you, so I had to punch you first to defend myself."

"They made the dentist in Marathon Man the bad guy! Imagine, a man comes to America, clearly skilled, and wants to start a business with his diamond fortune. I thought Dems were all about immigration, but I guess not!"

New boots goofin'.

Because people don't vote and then kill people behind the wheel. They don't vote so much at a frat party that they pass out and die.

They probably charged it to an ICE credit card. So really WE, the taxpayers, took him to McDonald's. They just want credit for it.

"I blame the guy who invented the N-word, not the guy who used it."

Dutch Crunch Sour Cream and Dill are the GOAT

Agent 1: Then they jerked us off!
Reporter: Like, they grabbed your penis and stimulated you to orgasm? All of you?
Agent 1: No... They, like, curled their hands like they were holding a penis and then moved them up and down.
Agent 2: Yeah, while they rolled their eyes and said "real cool."

"If two out of every five Americans would simply volunteer to be ground into Soylent Green, we wouldn't have a hunger problem in this country."

I'm so proud of the parents from our school and community for stepping up, but especially the teachers and staff. They are coordinating online learning, food support, directing families to resources, acting as patrols/monitors. This is not the job they signed up for but they're doing it.

Trying to come up with a list of things I would rather watch than the Melania film. Open heart surgery footage. Power-walking marathon. Porno starring my grandparents. What else?

"In theater"? My friend, south Minneapolis ain't Hamburger Hill. Your troops shot a man in front of a donut shop.

Hannibal Lector is taking the Andy Rooney spot on 60 Minutes.

Whistles don't make noise. People do.

Is he wearing one black glove or is that hand just fully dead, necrotic tissue now?

I love the free samples they hand out at my local underground rebel supply depot.

a bald man is sitting in a chair and pointing at the camera ALT: a bald man is sitting in a chair and pointing at the camera

What sort of brilliant criminal mastermind could come up with such a scheme?

"Let's just say I've been circling it for a while now. I still own a small condo on Alberta Island. I haven't sold my stock."

In solidarity with today's ICE OUT OF MINNESOTA blackout, MinnMax is donating $1 to the Immigrant Law Center of Minnesota for every share of this Bluesky post for the next hour.

The discovery for his lawsuit should be fun. "I want to see all the data you've collected on what a huge piece of shit I am!"

Man, who is responsible for shifting the media narrative away from fraud investigations to ICE occupation? Someone oughta find that guy and fire him!

Like he's Voldemort or some shit...

Gettr? Why? So six people can see it?

This is how we win. One beer at a time. Neighbor to neighbor.

In the 1800s, women in Alabama gave birth by candlelight in cabins with dirt floors, no sanitation, and no doctors or modern medicine. I'm willing to guess modern Alabama women getting probed by robots would gladly trade places.

"I bet it's spelled B-O-R-E-D." -- Norm MacDonald

Male protesters are dressing up like sexy female protesters to lure ICE agents into walking over trap doors. When will it stop!