Speccy Twat

Just seen a twee emailed utterance of ‘rainbow bridge’ by some wanker at work, and now I feel such rage, I could kick my desk over… if only a) I hadn’t got a gammy leg, and b) I could be arsed.

#EuphemismAndNotAGoodOne
#Meh

🌈 🤮

Close up of a Crunchie bar, naked and snapped in half. As it were.

Friday.

FRIDAY! 🤘🏼😎

Oh, you clever, clever fella. Not like I didn’t know that already, but… this is sublime. And ridiculous.
All in one pisstakey dollop of joy 😂

Andrew Tate's twatty video only starts making any sense when you use different music

Ro-LAND, from Grange Hill; dark glasses, dark hair and the darkest stare this side of Mrs McCluskey.

❓

Hey, I might’ve dropped out of uni and underachieved my whole fucking life, but… here’s one for the CV! 🤩🥳

#SmallWinsAndAllThat

Connections
Puzzle #998
🟨🟨🟨🟨
🟦🟦🟦🟦
🟩🟩🟩🟩
🟪🟪🟪🟪

You’re a veritable walking Disney heroine 😁👌🏼

(Niiiiiice. 😎)

Sounds like a plan! 😁
Did my bit for the nesting birds today: gave one of my lunatic hounds a trim, and put some of the resulting removed fluff out on the garden; it makes a lovely lining for the nest.

I wish you well in your endeavours 😊

He was absolutely ace. Loved him; was an honour to co-own him for a bit of his life 😊

Grey and white cat, and tufty blonder border terrier, lying back to back and snoozing happily on a grey fleecy blanket.

Was lucky enough to share a cat with a neighbour for a couple of years, when his owners nearby had to move away (weren’t allowed pets in their new rental, which is frankly barbaric…). My Border loved him, and it was entirely reciprocated; he was an absolute beauty x

Oh, that’s awesome 😁

Narky little shitehawks, aren’t they? 😂🤘🏼

🎵 When the ball hits your head,
And you’re sitting in row Z,
That’s Mbeumo… 🎶

#Fußball

Splendido 😇

Here to help 😁

#StayClassy 😎

Always Maxi sanitary towels/ panty liners/ blob catchers/ gusset guards/ battle swabs etc., etc.

That reminds me:

What?! 🧐

Moi aussi! 🫨

See also: Aveline.

a woman with blonde hair is wearing a blue dress with white lace . Alt: Rose from the Golden Girls, shuddering and looking utterly repulsed.

Christ, no! Have you *seen* them?!

Methinks the Torygraph doth protest (protetht?) too much… 😄 💚

ChristopherJames Art Prints & Original Work by Christopher James

The wonderful @jameschristopher.bsky.social
designed the cover for my book — Connery: a Novel.
Prints for that cover as well as his other stupendous portraits can be found here for sale
christopherjamesart.bigcartel.com

(Entirely warranted.)

😂

“Smashing bacon and eggs, Mr Winton (RIP).”

The first rule of Pop Music Club is you never talk about Pop Music, talk about, pop music, shoobie doobie do wop, pop pop shoo wop Club.

Ho, no…

‘Dumb Britain’ from Private Eye, with almost unbelievably gormless answers given by quiz show contestants (“almost” because… well, ITV). 1) The Chase, ITV Bradley Walsh: Which sitar player founded the National Orchestra of India? Contestant: Gandhi Walsh: Which Marx brother said, “One morning, I shot an elephant in my pyjamas”? Contestant: Karl 2) Tipping Point, ITV Ben Shephard: What does the letter m stand for in the equation E=mc2? Contestant: Marshmallows

Bless x

@privateeyenews.bsky.social

#DumbIsBeingGenerous 😬

(Can’t tell I’ve got a sneaky day off, can you? Much…)

😬