Levi Weaver, but for baseball

Fine. I accept your terms, with the exception of the one hyper-specific scenario laid out above

Boots Randolph - Yakety Sax YouTube video by Liberitas

“But Levi, surely Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God) by Kate Bush should be the song”

No I’m sorry. That’s a classic, but Yakety Sax (Benny Hill theme song) should play EVERY TIME the benches clear

youtu.be/Zcq_xLi2NGo?...

In this absurd hypothetical, there is one and only one song that would be playing over the stadium speakers

Between GBs last pitcher and Mexico’s manager we really missed an opportunity to have Gil vs Gill Hill on the hill (at the stadium that used to have Tal’s Hill)

Aroldis Chapman deemed ineligible to represent Great Britain, who is SHOCKINGLY tied 1-1 with Mexico right now in the 8th inning

Thinking a lot more about lineage-based documentation right now than I ever expected to on a random Friday in March.

How could anyone root against a team with a guy named Mužík???

(Trick question, nobody is rooting against Czechia.)

Let’s save this one for when Ben Casparius is on the mound

This barely makes sense but the real WBC-heads know.

[to the tune of My Velouria by The Pixies]

[pointing]

That’s Satoria

Aidan Anderson, 6-1, 195, born 6/21/97 in Port Arthur, TX

Grant Anderson, 6-0, 213, born 6/21/97 in Port Arthur, TX

Me, watching this pitcher and recognizing his face, last name, and delivery: “Oh hey, Grant Anderson is back with the Rangers? I thought he was still with Milwaukee??”

He is.

(It’s not a Brady Feigl situation; they’re twins, I just completely forgot about this)

So far in Surprise, the Rangers and Royals have combined for 11 runs and four outs

Sort of saved myself from myself by forgetting that all start times were listed in ET and I live on CT.

So I got 2.5 hours of sleep instead of 1.5 and all it cost me was The Czechia / Korea Game Is Already Sort Of A Blowout

Increasingly my prayers are sounding more and more like “Could you have a word with your people, please?”

Anyway this is definitely my personal account and not my professional baseball account right? Sure would be embarrassing if I got those mixed up again

“Pray every day” - Marky Mark of Funky Bunch fame, on my TV

Like, buddy… I already do, but now you have me wondering if it’s working at all

Am I the only one getting a deluge of religious / religious programming commercials while watching the Australia / Chinese Taipei WBC game on FS1?

you think you've seen the whole movie, and then the alt text reveals you haven't even finished act two

Feels like he could just go by Pete Wingstrong and we would get the point.

7. If you are a fan, it is ok to say “Oh wow, I did not realize <player> was on the <team> now!”

(7A. If you write about baseball as a career, don’t say that part out loud.)

Okay you’re all set, enjoy spring training!

5. Your 17th reliever on the depth chart is 38 and on a minor-league deal. He’s on his ninth organization, and should not be paid much attention to if he struggles.

6. Unless he strikes out the side or has a spring ERA under 2.00, in which case… man that guy is lookin’ pretty good.

3. Spring training wins and losses don’t matter AT. ALL. Especially if your team loses a bunch of games.

4. Unless your team wins a bunch, then they’re lookin’ good.

For any newcomers to the sport, here is the Spring Training Fan Rulebook:

1. if your team allows a HR: they’re just getting their work in, or trying out a new pitch, it’s fine

2. if your team hits a HR (even against a 19 year old minor leaguer) that guy is in mid season form, he’s lookin’ good.

Well this is about the deepest cut I’ve seen on this site

You know it’s spring training when you start getting the itch to post things like “Man, Grant Wolfram’s slider looks nasty”

“Now batting third for the Phillies … R.L. Stine!”

(I actually think the shoes are fun, but roasting shoes is more fun)

Send me your Venmo!

My lazy-but-I-mean-it Super Bowl takes:

- so many dumb boring AI commercials

- a beautifully creative halftime show that stood in contrast to bullet point #1 (and also to everything that has caused me to want to climb under a mountain and die lately)

- happy for Seattle

- cool that #9 did good

I’ll take it

Whomever chose Bad Bunny for the halftime show deserves a raise or a statue. This is so outside the box of anything that has ever happened before. Prince is still my number one but this is a whole different thing.