Peepeeslaps

super fun and cool and awesome how grief will just hit you like a truck in the middle of the day with 0 prompting

back to work tireeddddd i couldnt sleep at all bc of coughing fuccckk the flu this year

honestly this is any muesum imho. its just plastic junk and its such a shame

we need sbr so bad it will fix everything

the way he hid so much of his suffering in his life from me when he didnt anyone else, and how my life would likely have been radically different without him in it. i am so angry i wish he knew the massive hole he ripped in my life. and im so guilty how little i appreciated him being in my life

my first digital art tablet was a christmas gift from my uncle. he knew and understood what i was into as a kid and just totally understood me and actually cared about my interests and what i liked and i felt like if he could be an adult and still be weird then theres hope for me. and now hes gone

i feel horrible ive not been able to do my yearly christmas cards i love to do, and i havent been able to think about what to get people, anytime i start to try to sit down and think about it my brain kinda goes black snd its like 3 days later

i think i am just going to have to tell people im seein during christmas that like, hey, im sorry im kinda dropping the ball on christmas this year bc my life has been a nightmare that i cant wake up from since november and time doesnt exist for me right now

it feels so weird to say, but the bgas reminded me of him becsude its like theres so much hed be so hyped for that he will never get to experience. this is the worst thing anyone could do to their loved ones

i feel like im never going to be able to stop thinking about this, i want to go through all the stages of grief and get over it but i feel like im just always cycling through it daily and in random order

i just cant believe hes gone, i feel like this has to be a sick joke

by god i am going to get the spark back i am going to draw and create and paint again i have to

i changed my art @ on everything to a surname pun

bf an me took a walk today and it felt good to feel normal for a bit

its so frustrating going into the holiday season. i keep crying like every day and it is exhausting, i feel like my brain is all marbles

i want to draw again, i wish i could draw again. I feel horrible guilt anytime i do something i like and ive been hating drawing this entire year so maybe i can cancel things out and try drawing again

i need to say it more, it just feels weird but im never taking this for granted ever again. god damnit. at least i have therapy today. make some sense of up and down hopefully

today was going a bit better til i stupidly decided to reread our old dms and i hate how this is the most recent time we said this

i have therapy tomorrow and theres a group therapy in december im going to attend but they feel so fsr away and my grief feels so big to me like i know i shojldnt compare but i do

i knowni need to do normal things to feel normal but this grief is at the edge of my entire brain all the time and it just feels endless

being back at office i thought it would be ok and i could get through the day but im on crying sesson 2 in the bathroom and its not even noon

having to push through the feelings of being a vulture or a thief in order to hold onto some things of my uncles. In retrospect i know i will appreciate it and kick myself for not taking more, but right now it just feels yucky. If I could trade everything for him back i would.

ive had a lot of death in my lifr since 2020 ive had to navigate but navigating a suicide death is such an intense new beast of grief

it didnt btw

New risograph from Australian illustrator and unionist Sam Wallman in the shop! justseeds.org/product/what...

i wanna try and do a project this year that ive been thinking abt for a while, i just hope my energy maintains

a couple of anime girls are standing next to each other in a room with the words trainer issue on the bottom . ALT: a couple of anime girls are standing next to each other in a room with the words trainer issue on the bottom .

I am dudes btw

Dude be like “my haru urara sucks”.
My brother in christ, you build the trainee

Damn rough day for mtl fires wtfff

Maybe from the fire last night on tower/cote st caterine?