and risk losing my wife? no thank you

I dont know if my wife would approve of me taking another woman to Italy. I'll ask

a sudden urge to go to Milan is building

the flow on X33n is CRAZY

wait a second, i breathe oxygen. (must resist urge to do murdery things)

My house got robbed the other day, but the robbers only took my fruit. When I realized this, I was left peachless... peachless

im suprised no one suggested "even more gutters", or "gutters for gutters"

this was very helpful, thank you!

say you're Canadian without saying you're Canadian

great question for which I have no answer, but our 20lb blue healer bullies our 80lb black lab and our 70 lb golden retriever every day

100% on the rage bait, so so sad that's what's rewarded

I just let em rip, if people are unhappy (super rare for me) that's on them. I don't hop on to offend anyone

wow pasta, thats a huge tv, you must be rich, can i have $20 to feed my kids

impressive

W

heard nothing but great things about that game

deadass, he does look like you

mainly just reserving my name, things on twitter have for certain gotten worse

we gotta work on your salute buster