Sara

excited for the new kinds of techno that are about to be invented

a screenshot from accuweather of next week's forecast in Chicago. Monday is sunny and 70F, raining Tuesday, 40F by Wednesday. this is madlibs for weather

this is three seasons worth of weather, how I am supposed to pack for this

the rest of the country has got to get on the No Weather bandwagon, it's so much easier

I'm gonna be in Chicago for work next week and it just occured to me that they might still be having Weather

this is the littlest guy who ever was

we gotta tell the F1 guys

red is the fastest color it's the car color for a reason

F, babe, love the commitment to precision, but achieving that might be easier on a flat surface

I would go see Two Dogs Fall In Love

I rolled my ankle pretty good for the billionth time a week ago and what I actually need to do is start regularly wearing a brace, but what if boots instead

surely a pair of boots that are built to outlive the sun and weigh 7lb each would fix me

having a minor midlife crisis and considering buying a pair of enormous fuck-off combat boots

rickroll is the eternal joke format

this asshole thinks his name is Markwayne Mulligan

no? the video of kidd rock pulling off his shirt and smacking RFK on the ass isn't doing it?

His weakness was failing to apply this lesson to appointing leaders of the countries he conquered where his signature move was, "what if my dipshit brother"

I absolutely have shadow processes running that I justified at the time with "this is my emotional support database, leave me alone" that we fall back on at least once a quarter because the other team borked the primary one

It feels like rinsing out the whole house

time for my favorite spring day - the first day it's both warm and super windy and I can throw all the windows open and just let it rip

Baz Luhrmann's Marriage of Figaro

they all work - someone please make Baz Luhrmann adapt an opera

we can do spectacle without superheroes, I believe in us

Baz Luhrmann's Don Giovanni

we don't pay teachers enough to have that dropped on them their day off

She was just trying to have a normal day pushing her 2yo on the swings and now there's this huge problem she's apparently responsible for.

I do think about that teacher we told a lot now that I'm grown. She couldn't have been much more than 30. I'm 43 and could not tell you what I would do before cell phones if two kids rode their bikes by me in the park, yelled out that there was a guy getting beat up, and then rode away.

I regularly forget this happened - later in high school several of us found a corpse not that far into the orange grove that bordered the high school and that made WAY more of an impression

(I grew up in a very normal town, it wasn't a hellmouth or anything, there was just these two incidents)

So I didn't even know I HAD witnessed a murder until like 5 years later when my mom trotted this out at a family barbeque.

Anyway, that's probably why I wanted to be a cop into college where I realized all the other folks who wanted to be cops sucked shit and I didn't want to work with them.

They were all like 19 or 20. The guy they beat up later died, and the cops came to my house and my friend and I had to look at a book of mug shots but didn't recognize anyone. My mom made the cops promise not to tell us the guy died unless we had to testify, which we did not.

My friend and I were riding our bikes in the neighborhood park, and 4 guys got out of a car and beat the shit out of this other guy who was in the park. We didn't see most of it, we hightailed out to go tell a teacher of ours who was on the other side at the playground with her kids.

I know several of you are about to post something very empathetic, please do not, I was fine then and I'm fine now.