just chris

You have to survive. There are graves to piss on that haven't been dug yet.

[paris, 1163]

Jean de Chelles: yeah I can design your new cathedral

Bishop Maurice de Sully: great

Jean de Chelles: gonna put some weird guys on the roof though

Tufted titmouse showing off his peanut

Everything sucks. Here's a bird with a peanut.

anthropic: I have made AI

tech nerds: you fucked up a perfectly good computer is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety

Also we had to mayonnaise a snake today? Not a euphemism Had to...?? [photo of a gloved hands holding a snake covered in mayonnaise] Why did you make him tangy Delivered

happy day of the dude, everyone!

Be Kind* An illustration of a frog in a modern jazz dancing pose Text reads: BE KIND* * of odd Jaunty Art 26

Be Kind*

The common hippopotamus, who resents being called "common" as he says he has varied interests and reads avidly. For example, he enjoys different types of grasses as seen here

mods r asleep, post potamus

In-flight announcement patreon.com/berkeleymews

I would argue that this is not WORSE than murdering a puppy but my god it is so much fucking weirder.

[inventing the hot air balloon] I don't give a fuck where I go

An important academic update

Halal Truck Mr. Beast

Eldest boy has taken to sending me messages and emails sporadically that look normal but when opened are just Halal Truck Mr. Beast

Optical illusion of a woman bent over some papers. Her sunglasses are pushed up and she is wearing a hair band so the top of her head looks exactly like a Muppet face

Sorry I know the world is in a terrible fix but I've been laughing at this for ten minutes now

Possum on a motion blurred background: "My brain has many things to hold and no pockets"

My dog weirdly watching me with one eye around the corner

he see u

A top-down closeup photo of a pale yellow flower with serrated-tip petals, with the ground and leaves below out of focus. There are two little moths in the flower; the moths have a fuzzy gray thorax, and cream-colored wings with thin bands and edges of deep pink.

These pretty, day-flying moths (Heliolonche pictipennis), only about 1 cm. long, are one of my favorite desert spring insects. The only flowers they visit (desert dandelion, desert chicory, or scale bud) close up at night; the moths sleep inside them, which is scientifically adorable. #BugSky 🌿🐙🌼

I really don't think I should have to verify that I am human to look at the Cheesecake Factory menu online. Dogs and robots should be able to look at 57 types of cheesecakes too.

a picture of a white and orange cat, blurred by a window

you will unlock this cat at level 10

SLUGGO IS SITTING ON THE CURB WITH HIS FACE IN HIS HANDS SLUGGO: I'M BORED--I THINK I'LL BECOME A BEATNIK THOUGHT FOR THURSDAY

SLUGGO’S THOUGHT
FOR THURSDAY

Dear Heavenly Father, in this holy season of Lent we petition thee for just like a soupçon of schism energy to bring the vibes up around here. Please grant our blessed Pope the strength to excommunicate Vance and maybe a few other assholes for good measure. In the White Sox’ name we pray. Amen

It's not that AI is useless.

It's that AI is useful like asbestos was useful.

sorry i didn’t text you back; i clicked “close all tabs” in my brain and forgot everything i’ve ever known

A cartoon from the 1950’s that’s more relevant than ever 💔

If you find yourself thinking "other people's bodies and genitals are my business, I should be the one making decisions about it" YOU NEED TO GO TO FUCKING THERAPY!

a pack of kittens closes in a a large dog standing on a chair

David Attenborough [whispering]:

“As the predators close in on their helpless prey, we can only watch in silent horror, for it is not man’s role to interfere in the hierarchy of nature.”

a deer with antlers absolutely covered by ferns and looking fabulous

How do you like my new look? Be honest.

the two most enduring political lessons I learned from my dad were “Willetts don’t cross picket lines” (as I enter month 5 of my Starbucks fast 💀) and “Willetts always vote for tax increases”

my mom’s was “if the wording seems vague or confusing, look at the names of who sponsored the bill”

I didn't stop to take a pic but there's a new ad campaign in subways with a picture of Matt Murdoch labeled "MISSING" and a picture of Daredevil labeled "WANTED" side by side and they are very clearly the same guy, I think the police detectives of that fictional universe are not entirely on the ball