James Webpage

I invented a candy bar in my dream last night called a SnickSnack. It’s a snickers but you replace the nougat with a KitKat wafer.

Licings plate

*Diving headfirst into a rock crusher* get ready with me to become sand

The tik tok error message but it says “James is temprorarily unavailable. We’re working on this issue, thank you for your patience”

New out of office reply format just dropped

Phrenologists back in the day were like “skull issue”

The tarmac slomo walk scene from Armageddon but Luigi Mangione is photoshopped into it.

This is so good. I love this shit. I eat this up like an English breakfast

so there's this farmers commercial where they're watching "red one" and the male insurance agent says "I think it's a recreational vehicle" in regards to santa's sleigh. why the fuck would he think that? santa obviously uses it for work, is he stupid? is this guy just extremely bad at his job?

learning kung fu like neo by replacing my fruit by the foot with old power rangers VHS tapes.

Headline that reads “Maryland Republican Nino Mangione slammed for not turning in cousin Luigi for UnitedHealthcare shooting”

his name is nino mangione and you expect him to snitch on his cousin luigi?

That is a snake

If Millie Bobby Brown grows to 1000 times her size, she becomes Bobby Brown

A hand washing infographic that uses the Benegesserit “mind killer” mantra.

The Unabomber: And then the left tried to cancel me. They showed up at my door and arrested me for my posts

Joe Rogan: Wow

i’ve been arrested at the airport for wall clipping through TSA (crawling through the xray machine) i am being sent back to spawn (prison)

Remote control jesus

there should be lunch eggs that are bigger than breakfast eggs and dinner eggs that are larger still

So what is everyone going as for thanksgiving this year?

The famously edgy working class

Mike and Ike are gay married

call me a killjoy but the midnight train going anywhere sounds like a logistical nightmare

Swing low (swing low) sweet chat roulette,
cumming travelocity gnome.

An image of cartoon megatron breaking a steel beam. It says “megatron breaks a steel beam.”

This is what I do whenever someone tries to tell me the rules of this place

Just make them a special soundproof bubble in the back, they can sing all they want. Until the air runs out I guess.

boomers: hahaha
gen x: lol
millennials: lmao
gen z: ijbol
gen alpha (hovering 5 ft above the ground while calibrating plasma gun with an ipad): aaaaaaaa

To this day when someone says “riddle” yoda flashes into my brain and gives me the finger and runs away.

When I was a kid my father casually explained yoda to me by saying that he “speaks in riddles”, and that single phrase caused a fundamental misconception in my mind about what a riddle was.

Like for the longest time I though riddles were just mixing up the order of words in a sentence.

There must be some kinda way out of here
Said Al Roker to the thief

So fucked up 2 think about