bayne

i have got to get some new fridge magnets i cannot keep using the pee in my mouth magnet to pin up christmas cards and wedding invitations....

dark outside at 6pm thinking i will perhaps become seasonally depressed about this

I don't have an ergonomic setup for my work laptop so im always looking slightly down while working, however i balance this out by having my projector screen for games/movies hung slightly too high so that i have to look slightly up :3

I am not "taking care of myself" today I'm scrolling baby FUCK it

anyone feel like doing something special, something huge. something that’s sure to impress a young jodie foster

problem being that I too forget im on here lol

Look at these dummies in their matching sweatshirts

Black and white photo of a strong jawed middle aged man wearing a sport coat and sitting up with his left hand on his knee in a manly posture. He is looking up above his left shoulder where a shorthaired white and tabby kitten is perched, looking like it’s a bit stunned by the flash.

The 50s. When men were real men and never left the house without their shoulder kittens. Photo from my collection, no further info.

Mexican drug cartels have an incredible one time opportunity to reinvent their image and remake their PR efforts for an entire generation, simply by doing one thing. One right thing to do, along the border specifically, with one Livestream.

A man shows James Joyce a computer and says "James Joyce, I know you're disoriented since coming ot the future, but allow me to comfort you with the miracle of internet pornography." James Joyce, impressed, says "wow, can you get fart stuff on here?" The first man does the Dreamworks face and says "in nigh unlimited quantities." James Joyce, filled with unimaginable happiness starts crying tears of joy.

nobody played the game better, or kissed his son weirder

i’m stoked for 10-15 years from now when we finally get the documentary Tom Brady: What The Hell Was Even Going On With That Guy

Does your friend plan on coming back as a skeleton after they die? Look for the warning signs. Started saying “no bones about I” Drinks whole milk and says “feels good” after Learning to play the xylophone Plans on living easy off of “skeletal retirement” Hates boneless wings Accidentally called Dracula “dad” Dreams of having their face on a bottle of poison one day Building a car made out of bones “for later”

Good morning bluesky ☀️

if i vaped i could post something like "call me sebulba the way im racing for my pod" but i do not alas

in the 90’s, computers would scream every time you went online. that‘s called foreshadowing

the drink makes the macros balanced it has 20g of protein:3

A four-panel cartoon titled Know Your Northern Cardinals. Panel 1 shows a young cardinal and is labeled Juvenile. Panel 2 shows a bright-colored male cardinal and is labeled Adult Male. Panel 3 shows a terrifying molting cardinal with an entirely bare head of grey skin and a few scraggly crest feathers, and is labeled Bloodcheep, Frightful Molt-Demon of the Cursed Abyss. Panel 4 shows a greenish female cardinal and is labeled Adult Female.

Know Your Northern Cardinals.
My newsletter: tinyletter.com/rosemarymosco

Portland Oregon has fallen to uruk hai

[gas station attendant pulls the premium pump out and lets me sniff the nozzle] *I nod*

yes that is leftover movie theater popcorn from last night)

girl dinner but make it lunch

used book store find

i forgot how much joy brandon sanderson brings me with his writing

How do you want your eggs?
Bacon, sausage, or ham?
Hashbrowns or grits?
White, wheat, raisin, or a biscuit?
And a regular waffle?

*phoebe bridgers at the end of i know the end voice* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

no sleep,,, horrible existential dread and anxiety,,,, generally having a bad time.... we still meepin tho

meep morp

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qX1DajHwEM