Chris Edwards

Now is the time for me to come clean and admit I started using a fountain pen six months ago and have not looked back.

Winning is really a state of mind. If you are the plaintiff, and an appellate court, affirms the dismissal of your complaint, you’ve sort of one. You no longer have to pay me, think of all the savings.

The extraordinary renditions will continue, until we get a regime that we like!

I am writing a brief that involves a lot of discovery requests and discovery sanctions. I’m sticking to my guns and not block quoting anything.

This is the seventh circle of Hell.

I’m going to start telling my clients that they’ve won, no matter the outcome. I won’t be explaining what I mean. If they disagree, I will tell them the same thing, but louder.

Both politicians and lawyers should learn that you aren’t supposed to capitalize Very Important Words just because they are Very Important.

This, by the way, was the nightmare scenario for the second Trump presidency.

I’m an Eagle Scout. And people wonder why I don’t give back or engage…

Thought about getting a semi colon, or a Picasso dachshund, there. Did it hurt?

The Gang of 8 briefing was just a video of explosions synced with the William Tell Overture.

I see your Costco pizza and raise you the Costco chicken cordon bleu

If they’d just consent we could all avoid this but oh yes the government doesn’t do that

Christ. Mowed = lose

You aren’t there to make your case. You’re there to answer their questions. Don’t worry if you finish early, it means they understand your argument.

Don’t fight the hypothetical. If a judge asks you to assume you mowed it’s fine to say you disagree but don’t take it as an opportunity to tell them how right you are.

You’ve got to consider all your arguments and know when one isn’t working. Be prepared to make your points but to pivot.

This is my actual oral argument strategy

Me, when the associate points to their screen and asks “what do you think about this sentence?”

(1) I have never heard of a college political group doing so and (2) I am also certain that Orban would have had 95%…”support” even without the endorsement

Bring me lunch on your finest china.

I laughed until I realized it wasn’t a shit poster. Or maybe until I realized the Executive Branch is now a collective shit poster.

He watched the press conference on one of his 35 screens. The other were littered with Ilya Wurman articles

New to the series and not sure how. Trying to diversify my heavily non-fiction TBR.

Came across Operation Bounce House, noted the authors name, realized he’d written a whole (unrelated) series, and dove in.

Doing Very Serious Legal Work in Nashville this weekend.

Might have predicted Pizza Gate

Predates my chronically online status by just a few years. Earlier this week, I had to explain to a younger coworker who Kimbo Slice was. I also had to explain that people used to just fight on YouTube.

You just saved me so much time. Finishing the last chapter of the book I’m reading and putting on my tinfoil hat.

Kash Patel leading an FBI investigation searching for Quinn Hughes ghosts.

Unfamiliar. Now I need context. I love a good lunatic.

On the one hand, we have 11 players injured (some very good!). On the other hand, the players we have healthy are…well…they’re something

I guess I should come clean. I think that guy already uses amphetamines.