Jes Gearing

A liar stays a liar, a fuckup stays a fuckup, and a bad and dishonest party will stay a bad and dishonest party. A sports fan knows a free rider in the system when they see one, because the New York Jets exist. They recognize bad faith actors because they’ve seen EPL ownership. Watch this: This year the Atlanta Falcons will be different. You’re laughing, because you already know how this ends. It’s not nice, but you’re still laughing. 

It's not nice but that doesn't stop it from being true

Oh no

Michelle Obama suggested people eat vegetables and conservatives lost their minds.

yeah anyone who thinks this is a great idea wants a five year old victim to have to choose if they want their relative to die

Was realllllly hoping that was in the Irish Channel in New Orleans, ngl 😭

Me at 20: I’ll have it all figured out by the time I’m 40.

Me at 40: wtf do you mean they rearranged the grocery store

what is with these people and dogs?

the left has received both football and butts in the divorce

this place has everything

* pedro pascal dancing by the market
* lady gaga
* dudes grinding
* subtle references to creeping american fascism
* a FIELD on a FIELD
* republican tears

What are we even doing anymore.

Old Spice’s Fiji scent threaded the needle for me. I can’t stand the baby powder vibe personally

It’s almost Olympics time! Say hello to Tina and Milo, the mascots of the 2026 Winter Olympiad.

In my mind, they sound like valley kids “OH MY GOD LIKE SO NICE TO MEET YOU”

there was a point at which this man posted in complete sentences and, like the rest of us, this has broken him

Learning to poof!

me about fandoms an hour ago: don’t stan anything. how do you think things got so bad

me when I hear the new Amy Grant song: SEE WHAT MY QUEEN HAS DONE FOR US. DID I NOT TELL YOU SHE REIGNS. GROVEL YOU INSOLENT WORMS

Philippa Islington-Smythe - aka my cat Roscoe - hanging out at home

THREAD. In her exclusive interview in today's Daily Telegraph Magazine, the actor, influencer and designer Philippa Islington-Smythe (pictured) discusses the price of fame, her controversial new perfume, working with Margot Robbie and how becoming a parent changed her perspective on the world...

the reason people sometimes act madder at democrats than republicans when republicans do impossibly evil shit is the same reason why, if you hired an exterminator to handle a roach infestation and he showed up to feed and play with them instead, your first instinct wouldn’t be to yell at the roaches

I used to manage wine programs for movie theaters and I am in the extremely unique position to say with professional certainty that the answer here is a crisp Albariño.

What happens after we eat the mascot? You cheer the Pop-Tart Bowl pastry. We cheer the mascot movement.

it’s @poptartsbowl.com game day which once again begs the question

Three pop tarts will die today at Bowlgotha

The one in the middle is your savior

Note: I’m no longer at that nonprofit so maybe it stopped

Also my friend’s kid is learning “how to write a book” by using it to make prompts. His teachers are teaching him this. I just 😭

So actually IDK…I lurk on this board for corporate women and you’d be amazed at how often people post answers about using ChatGPT to plan a vacation or organize their clothes or whatever. Also my boss at a major env nonprofit uses it to write all his emails. It’s bleak out there

my favorite past time when talking to much younger men is to give them advice on wooing women that is really just care and feeding instructions for iguanas

NFL Films made this for all of us.

A Carol of the DOINKS.

Doc Bullfrog absolutely KILLING IT

Doc Bullfrog, you smoke too tough. Your swag too different. Your bitch is too bad. They’ll kill you.