Allison Wyss (But the abyss... It's still in my heart.)

So what motherfuckers I can just order all those books sent to my house instead of trying to cram them in an already full suitcase this is a subtweet.

I love the space between these posts. It’s makes me know that, Oh, you are one of my own heart.

I've thought too much about it and now I have no idea how to say that a person is not sleeping anymore. I mean this physically and not politically. This is, for once, a _WRITING_ problem. All of those words feel wrong and they always will.

I don’t know what to actually do but the words I typed back at them felt really good.

I guess people really think we get a second chance at making a good world. Maybe that's why they're so happy to fuck it all up and make it hateful and miserable. But even if we do get another one, we don't get a second chance at making THIS world good. And, fuck, it really could be good.

I hate it.

What’s it called when every achievement just makes you terrified of the next thing they might expect you to do.

Or maybe I'm the only one allowed to open the drawer because I'm the one who _won't_ see.

The dresser I had growing up was my great grandmother's and now it's in my kid's room. It's not particularly attractive, certainly not in good shape, but it's kind of like my friend. The bottom drawer won't budge for anyone else in the house, but it's smooth and completely effortless for me.

I appreciate this. It’s not quite what I feel like my situation is though.

Ok, it’s not over, but I wrote a little bit today and it felt mostly good and only a little bit like my-god-how-can-you-play-with-stupid-little-words-when-you-could-be-materially-helping-a-human-being-who-is-under-literal-physical-attack? I don’t know if it’s progress or numbness but there it is.

Then I asked her when she turned 45.

Some parents lie, for sure. I try really hard not to. In this case it was more of a, yeah, I feel that, it’s really hard but you’re doing great.

My 11yo, just now: Do you ever feel deeply tired of holding yourself together?

That’s so warm and fuzzy.

It would be a different experience watching battlestar galactica today because you’d know to just watch for their hands.

I forgot to promote my upcoming writing class about evil an empathy because there is too much evil and too much empathy.

Can you move straight from Goonies to Lost Boys or is it a requirement to pass through Stand By Me?

Embracing Constraint through the Expansion of Going Deeper: A Conversation with Tayyba Kanwal - The Rumpus “I think “escape” does work in that we all need to escape our constraints. How we escape them is the question. Do you escape by breaking down the structures? Or do you escape control by finding ways t...

I've been so caught up in things (still happening, btw) that I did not promote this interview as I should have. It's such a wonderful book and @tayyba.bsky.social had really brilliant things to say:

The point is that rent relief is a great way you can contribute even from afar.

It's not just violently abducting people from their homes, jobs, childcare, churches, mosques, and schools. It's also evicting them from their homes because they can't pay rent because their family has been abducted, or their place of work has been shut down, or they're in hiding & can't work.

And there it was. Just a normal post. But it’s not because they actually left. They did not leave. Abductions have not stopped. But since they won’t, I’m not going to get an all clear to go back to normal, am I? (Not that I want normal. I’m ready for the after.)

You know how you pop the straw through the plastic for a boba? I keep wanting that but through your (k)n95 when you want to drink something.

I’m not trying to be virtuous or remind you of anything. I am selfishly complaining that everything is so awful that I can’t enjoy even the simplest things.

I am enjoying a beautiful day, mostly outside, with my kid. And I am haunted by how many parents are separated from their kids, and how many families can’t be outside.

We’ve actually got the filming part covered. What we want from you is the not abducting and murdering part.

The insult of body cameras as a potential solution.

Thank you. It is so much worse than I ever thought it could be. Also, it somehow hasn’t felt right to post in the other place. Maybe because that’s always long conversations and I just can’t do that about this.

It's not back to normal; it's this new horrifying normal. It's horror that we're forced to normalize to survive it. Such that I do think of light funny things to post sometimes, instead of only about the horrors. And some day, despite the horror, I will. But so far, I can't. I just can't.

I guess folks are sick of hearing about the invasion of my city, especially as some tiny symbolic concessions have been made and the lawmakers might kind of talk about giving the invaders slightly less money. But it's still happening. We are still invaded. They are still abducting my neighbors.