Jäger 60/60 (live posting from the insane asylum)

Signalis is the reason I’m about to splurge potentially hundreds of $$ on an East German dress uniform kit, that shit goes hard

Me out loud when I’ve had one too many drinks with my friends:

They 100% do💀

No these are not Nazis this is from communist East Germany who were mostly based with massive drip

Now THIS is how you do a military parade. Just sayin’

I used to work in law enforcement. This is the correct take

I also physically look like a STAR but that’s a story for another day. But yes I’m literally just a short STAR with long hair

If you asked me what my hobbies are you’d think I’m a STAR (I’m an active competitive shooter)

If you went by what I read I’d be a Storch (history/mythology w/ a focus on the period of 2nd Temple Judaism)

If you went by my height…. BAHAHAHA. I’m Kolibri sized (152 cm)

Kinda based ngl

I think in the case of STARs, they frequently allow persona deg more often than they’re supposed to. Otherwise they’d be dropping STARs left and right. Just look at the turnover/suicide rates for real life STARs (corrections officers), you don’t work that job w/o it fucking with you badly

My name is Jäger and I wear a panzer jacket, I should just go by Panzerjäger at this point

Them: “Don’t get too political”
Me: “Okay”
Also me after 1 drink (I’m a lightweight af):

As someone who has actually worked a STAR job, I can guarantee you these ladies are likely given HELLA leeway in terms of persona deg. You do not do this job without it fucking you up in some kind of way (often times the worst ways)

Fun fact: of the 3 Protektors listed on the range scoreboard in S-23, only Jäger would qualify for a civilian concealed carry permit in my state (US). There is a live fire portion of the qualification exam and you have to score 75% of your shots to earn your CCW

I LIVE MOTHERFUCKERS

the "esc" key on a keyboard is a holdover from early-'90s personal computers. on some models it would dispense a can of escargot out of one of the unused drive bays. they put it in the corner so you wouldn't press it by accident because you only got three of them. i pushed it once and got grounded

I forgot I was on this website. I love free speech. I’m going to be so unhinged on here, so if you get weirded out, the unfollow/block button is right there. Cheese