Joe Rhodes

on threads jbpritzker posted a(n obviously fake) linkedin screenshot showing kristi noem is “open to work.” her title is listed as DHS Secretary (Former) | Public Speaker | Unlicensed Dog Euthanizer

holy hell

I'm worried when Kristi Noem finds out she's been fired she's going to become America's first obedience school shooter.

🚨 THIS IS NOT A DRILL. kristi noem is doing a live speech right now and doesn't know she was fired. 🚨

ME: pack a bag, we’re flying to kansas

MY WAYWARD SON: what kind of bag

U.S. Races to Accomplish Iran Mission Before Munitions Run Out President Trump says the Iran campaign might last a week or longer, but dwindling stockpiles could limit his options.

i'm no fancy military strategist but "we didn't really plan so we're going to run out of munitions soon" seems not great

Some bot account complaining about pronouns in bio shit. I asked the bot to write a poem about pangolins and it did

It happened again

Kash Patel is going to make history as the first FBI director to get medically evacuated from Burning Man

It’s so funny to think about the fact that there’s people out there deferring every life decision to this

In a country with an actual free press, the photo of that poor old man would be the cover of every single paper with a headline that reads ENOUGH.

That boy ain't right.

It's probably from swallowing his own bullshit.

The “if she had complied, she’d still be alive” line that we’re hearing from ICE defenders is the mantra of apologists for security forces in dictatorships through the ages.

Is what Trump is envisioning for Venezuela something akin to East India Company?

So clearly she believes that her winning the Peace Prize is why he turned on her.

We can stop bombing the fishing boats now, right?

Kidnapping the leader of a foreign state without any declaration of war and announcing it via social media is full-on rogue state stuff. From the world’s number one superpower.

🫡

Shits AND giggles? In this economy?

Yes

So let me get this straight: The President’s plan to lower prices is to roll back some of his own tariffs?

A year (more or less) at sea Reporting from the vicinity of the Great Barrier Reef

traipsathon.substack.com/p/a-year-mor...

Image from "Back to the Future 2" showing Biff Tannen's Pleasure Paradise Casino in the alternate timeline of Hill Valley

New concept photo for the White House East Wing Ballroom just dropped

Amy Heckerling directed Fast Times At Ridgemont High, not Cameron Crowe. Probably ought to correct that.

Well, you can finally cross “I’ve seen a handcuffed, inflatable penis” off your bucket list

I wasn’t exaggerating it rules so hard

That sound you hear is plaintiff lawyers popping champagne corks and DOJ lawyers groaning.

In any other country, if federal agents fired upon journalists when unprovoked — what would we call it?

If federal agents marched down streets demanding papers — what would we say?

Authoritarianism — let’s not pretend it’s something else when it happens in our American cities.

Feds in military gear flood downtown Chicago; top border chief says people arrested based on ‘how they look’ The immigration agents were spotted making arrests in downtown Chicago and River North neighborhood early Sunday.

Whatever country you are from, the officially approved way to avoid getting grabbed off the street is to have pale enough skin. chicago.suntimes.com/immigration/...