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The Chatty Chimp

@chattychimp

Messing about in a tyre swing, enjoying my nuts and generally monkeying around.

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01.10.2023
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Latest posts by The Chatty Chimp @chattychimp

The IRGC says any Arab or European country that expels the ambassadors of Israel and the United States from its territory will, starting tomorrow, have full authority and freedom to pass through the Strait of Hormuz.

09.03.2026 21:41 πŸ‘ 460 πŸ” 184 πŸ’¬ 55 πŸ“Œ 45
Preview
How democratic is the UK? The UK has a crisis of democracy

Democracy in the UK

Unelected Head of state
Unelected second chamber of parliament
MPs pressurized to toe the party line
Political parties, too many legislators available for hire to the super-rich
Unlike the EU no workplace democracy

FPTP skews election outcomes

Deep social/economic problems.

09.03.2026 09:56 πŸ‘ 272 πŸ” 122 πŸ’¬ 12 πŸ“Œ 4

Dear Tony Blair

Fuck off

Yours

The people of Britain

08.03.2026 08:31 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

One thing I've learned about the law, pay attention to @barristersecret.bsky.social

08.03.2026 08:29 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Are you doing Brighton Fringe?

20.02.2026 21:41 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Dear internet,

Re Andrew, formerly known as His Nonceship.

Being arrested for Misconduct in Public Office is not the same as being arrested for abusing young girls.

19.02.2026 12:03 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Oh, the grand old duke of york
He β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ
He β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ
And he β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ

19.02.2026 11:06 πŸ‘ 6081 πŸ” 1739 πŸ’¬ 68 πŸ“Œ 37
A huge pile of rock, chalk and soil that has fallen from the sized cliff side to resemble a frowning, aquiline-nosed, bearded man

A huge pile of rock, chalk and soil that has fallen from the sized cliff side to resemble a frowning, aquiline-nosed, bearded man

A huge pile of rock, chalk and soil that has fallen from the sized cliff side to resemble a frowning, aquiline-nosed, bearded man

A huge pile of rock, chalk and soil that has fallen from the sized cliff side to resemble a frowning, aquiline-nosed, bearded man

While sudden cliff falls at Birling Gap (near my home town of Eastbourne) are no joke, I really love how much it looks like we’ve roused a grumpy, sleepy sea-wizard.

27.01.2026 21:36 πŸ‘ 528 πŸ” 160 πŸ’¬ 14 πŸ“Œ 11
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This is good

15.02.2026 17:31 πŸ‘ 29 πŸ” 9 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0
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β€œPoor people must work harder!” says Farage β€œWork harder” says Frottage. β€œDon’t you mean work smarter?”. β€œNo, I ahd it right the first time.”

wp.me/pa2M3v-7Nf
"Excuse me while I make another wild claim" says Putin's Little Helper.

15.02.2026 17:52 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
A West Country Week Bodmin to Redruth

New blog post of friendship , creativity , Doctor Who and Bodmin #reading #libraries #cornwall #creativity

thecosmicshamblesnetwork.substack.com/p/a-west-cou...

15.02.2026 17:34 πŸ‘ 48 πŸ” 8 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0

Indeed, I spat feathers and turned it off

13.02.2026 18:03 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

If you’re preparing to interview a known liar, the very least you could do is swot up on the very stuff he is most likely to tell lies about.

13.02.2026 16:20 πŸ‘ 1011 πŸ” 203 πŸ’¬ 46 πŸ“Œ 6

Sadly, the rail replacement bus from Whitechapel broke down at Cockfosters, and as you well know you can't go directly from Cockfosters to MC at that time of the morning so it's back one square for you.

10.02.2026 18:49 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I need a ruling, my understanding was that the Whitechapel Inversion was only allowable if you were in huff on the diagonal.

09.02.2026 11:08 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 1
BREAKING: β€œJustice Served” In Epstein Case - #BrokenNews
BREAKING: β€œJustice Served” In Epstein Case - #BrokenNews YouTube video by Larry & Paul

🚨 FINALLY: Justice Served In Epstein Case.

πŸ‘€ Join #BrokenNews for all the details. Watch and share this report:

youtu.be/DEHeex3VaOI?...

09.02.2026 09:12 πŸ‘ 69 πŸ” 36 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 1

The OP missed the point of MC which is to find amusing ways to avoid saying MC until boredom sets in or time runs out. Neither condition applies to true afficianado unless they are using the 1955 Hackridge variation with double nid on a Tuesday when Embankment is shut.

09.02.2026 09:31 πŸ‘ 6 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0
BBC headline: Inside Reform:
Laura Kuenssberg follows Farage's party as it experiences the glare of scrutiny

The words β€œas it experiences the glare of scrutiny” has been struck through with crude red lines.

BBC headline: Inside Reform: Laura Kuenssberg follows Farage's party as it experiences the glare of scrutiny The words β€œas it experiences the glare of scrutiny” has been struck through with crude red lines.

I fixed that for you. You’re welcome.

04.02.2026 07:55 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 2 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Look up the International Tricyclist sketch by John Finnemore. It's hilarious.

04.02.2026 08:11 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Amazing coda here.

02.02.2026 11:44 πŸ‘ 7517 πŸ” 1565 πŸ’¬ 51 πŸ“Œ 60
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β€œThe Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.”

An elected Republican legislator in Minnesota ⬇️

25.01.2026 19:38 πŸ‘ 768 πŸ” 167 πŸ’¬ 27 πŸ“Œ 12
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Like the man said. This is America-

25.01.2026 21:25 πŸ‘ 506 πŸ” 124 πŸ’¬ 29 πŸ“Œ 6

Nailed.
Nailed.
Fucking nailed.
πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

(Only slight note @coldwarsteve.bsky.social - maybe the flags should be at half mast and attached with cable ties.)

23.01.2026 13:56 πŸ‘ 21 πŸ” 5 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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It’s a real shame that Nigel Farage is too unwell to do interviews the morning after Donald Trump threatens us with sanctions.

Here he is with β€œthe bravest man he ever met”. He campaigned to make Trump President, and has spent the last year enjoying all the chaos he has caused.

18.01.2026 10:51 πŸ‘ 1945 πŸ” 754 πŸ’¬ 109 πŸ“Œ 45

ReformUKLtd trying to rebrand as #NaziLite

13.01.2026 19:26 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

ReformUK Ltd plans to Reform the UK by employing the wankers that spent 14 years in government driving the country into the ground. It's a plan so cunning it could be Baldric's.
p.s. spellscheck changed wankers to bankers. Well, it's not wrong.

13.01.2026 19:25 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

The Cheeto Pedo

13.01.2026 19:22 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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To shag his daughter

13.01.2026 18:59 πŸ‘ 45 πŸ” 7 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 0

Thats what I said! Wifey was impressed

09.01.2026 22:03 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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X launches new monthly subscription Pedo Premium+ Social media site X has launched a brand new monthly subscription service Pedo Premium+, according to its owner Elon Musk.

NEWS! X launches new monthly subscription Pedo Premium+ newsthump.com/2026/01/09/x...

09.01.2026 15:07 πŸ‘ 20 πŸ” 9 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0