Eric Hirsch

Cashing in my 401(k) to bet it on a Kalshi parlay for WWIII, the Second US Civil War, and another Revolutionary War all overlapping

Every picture I see of this woman she looks like she’s about to cameo as an unobtainable hottie on Married…With Children

Markwayne in the Membrane

Noem’s been tossed down Cypress Hill. Marky Markwayne’s too legit to quit. Reader, I haven’t seen a posse of clowns this insane since Dubya overtook Poppy back in the day

by Maureen Dowd

Markwayne: I don’t like this fucking name
Mullin: oh great of course it’s the one we all know who sucks
Fingered: well that’s a word that shouldn’t be in headlines
Nostrils: wait what the fuck
Of Colleagues: worse than ”fingering“ your own nostrils
And their spouses: …
During visit to israel: cmon

The phrase “each word more cursed than the last” gets thrown around a lot to describe headlines, but it is completely correct here*

*if you ignore “reportedly” and treat “of colleagues”, ”and their spouses”, and “during visit to Israel” as single word-units

NOEM TAKING QUESTIONS - DOES NOT APPEAR TO KNOW SHE WAS FIRED

HIMBY (himbos in my backyard)

[sung to the tune of "(I've Had) The Time Of My Life"]
🎶I...can't take...this shit any more🎵

From the nba community on Reddit: A Not Very Meticulous (and Somewhat Ridiculous) List of Clyde Frazier's Sublime Rhymes Explore this post and more from the nba community

Important Clyde Frazier content: www.reddit.com/r/nba/s/L5DW...
(Special shout outs to ”Ron Baker, the shot-maker” and “Jarrett Jack on the attack”)

as Karl Marx famously said, “religion is the opiate of them asses”

How long ya got

It’s insane this is legal. People around Trump are profiting off war and death. I’m introducing legislation ASAP to ban this.

I can think of one thing Trump could do that would result in spontaneous celebrations in Times Square

One of the biggest mysteries in life is why the Kars 4 Kids frontman had like a Dimebag Darrell guitar instead of like a Fender

K A S H Kash 4 Kids

ceejssandra

Not the important thing of course but I wish it didn’t just become normal for the president to wear tacky baseball caps all the fuckin time

No no this is good

Workshopping a theory that there is never an NBA game that doesn’t evoke a bad Lakers personnel decision

Twin peaks title image but it says 30 rock. Alright Hornberger

Obviously yes the eyes are pretty Crazy, but I think there’s something kind of grotesque about the mouthguard that elevates this photo to nightmare fuel

Cam’t Johnson

The purpose of this website is to help unburden your brain by releasing horrible sentences that live in there like demons

Jokic makes these crazy eyes at me I'm heading straight for the nearest airport

Everyone seems to have agreed to just ignore the time he more or less ended one of the Morris brothers’ seasons with a cheap shot

It’s kind of amazing that both cowbell and slap-pop bass feature prominently on the first Rage Against the Machine album

Nine Inch Nails - “Closer” (Kidz Bop Version)

Strategically placing the Spinach Littles at the front of the checkout conveyor belt so that the cashier knows that any questionable purchases are For The Kids

A MAGA zine? Sounds fuckin terrible