Take a break from reality with my podcast, My Sister’s A Therapist, where we talk to the amazing @mariabamford.bsky.social about toxic friendship, LA, and pugs!
podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m...
Omg Jackie this is Adorable!!
Fact 1: I am about five foot, eleven inches tall
Fact 2: nobody in my immediate family is taller than 5'6"
Fact 3: I just brained myself on a planter
Merry Christmas!
RIP!
2nd funniest person in Portland according to @heliumcomedypdx.bsky.social
Live to disappoint others! For your health! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m...
The same comics who believed their mom that people were bullying them because they were jealous now believe headliners don't invite them to feature because they're too intimidated by their skills. (I'm those comics.)
link to info and tickets rooster-t-feathers.seatengine-sites.com/events/117988
More like Gary Abusey amirite
Check out this week’s episode of My Sister’s A Therapist, featuring amazing comic @brandazzle.bsky.social and her aphantastic brain! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m...
Which caption is better?
I got eyes by Lasik, teeth by Invisalign, ass by Newman-O's.
Ok, we can either reward and value women based entirely on their physical appearance, or we can shame them for valuing and promoting their own physical appearance. You can see how doing both doesn't really make sense, right?
There’s nothing like a tennis sock popping off your heel inside your shoe to fill you with existential despair
What I’m looking forward to about death is I won’t have to promote stuff, or, at least, I hope I won’t? Any word on that?
Airplane WiFi is just good enough to pay for Airplane Wifi and nothing else
Wishing myself a happy birfday
After yesterday’s Vulture article abt Neil Gaiman‘s (alleged 🙄) history of sexually assaulting women- this is Bill Cosby for goths. Check in on your goth friends. I know we always seem anxious and depressed but it might be new levels.
Telling dirty jokes at Helium tonite at 11!
At a comedy festival, a man onstage is bitching about me calling him a toxic a-hole. I couldn’t be prouder.
DO NOT FLUSH
I’m not allowed to tell you why I’m promoting this show Saturday but if you live in Eugene you should come www.donttellcomedy.com/shows/eugene...
Ok but how about a movie where you have Hot to Go in your head for two days but on the third day you die
Wednesday in Vancouver, WA come watch the only Christmas program that matters, the Star Wars Holiday Special, hosted by @skotk.bsky.social!
What’s a nice way to ask if someone is using voice to text or if they are having a stroke?
this hotel smells like gingerbread and Christmas. It’s gonna make me fall in love with Pittsburgh
www.eventbrite.com/e/comedy-nig...
I was spacing out and thinking about Grace Jones' song from Frantic, "I've Seen That Face Before", which is a cover of Astor Piazzolla's Libertango at a gas pump. I got out and another Libertango is playing over the speakers. I have a superpower with zero practical crimefighting application.
Current Popular Comedy Tropes:
Pretending To Be Mad About Small Things
Fat Guys, Shirts Off
If I Yell It, It's A Punchline
I Pooped In Public, A Closer
White People Interpreting Rap Lyrics
Homeless People Are Weird
That Time I Ate Too Much Pot
Hillbilly Philosopher (Nihilism in a Trucker Cap)
