Willie Dustice

American soccer at every level seems hell bent on fumbling the World Cup

Military chaplains are such freaks. I remember I was doing a funeral detail and we were talking to the chaplain beforehand. This dude was looking at people in the crowd and talking about how hot the women were. I’ve never been happier to see a hearse roll up.

Cheeseburger is one of our few redeeming qualities

Keep honking! I’m chopping unc!

Cans of Schnucks brand evaporated milk

Ha! You seriously think I’m going to just buy an empty can? Evaporated milk! Be serious

makes u think 🤔

Will it be streamed on Gas Station TV?

The classics are classic for a reason

Speaking two languages

One of the indignities of this era is that I may have to live through the end of the world and it will be proceeded by someone posting “🚨BREAKING🚨”

But he was eager to get into the war, and secured a change in orders that sent him from San Francisco, aboard the USAT Dix.

Check out the transport ship he got a ride on in transit to the Philippine War

Back in the day when I would get junk mail with pre-stamped envelopes I would put coupons and ads from other companies in and send it back

First time, long time. Are they’re any notable political figures you plan to skewer with a witty post in Q2 of 2026? Thanks for your time

Look, Simba. Everything the fluorescent light touches is our kingdom.

Sir we‘re getting reports that war with Iran is cheugy

Common Naval Academy graduate L

They have the same dad and different moms

Iran is violating international norms around “home base” doctrine

The loss of life during Operation The Narwhal Bacons at Midnight was a small price to pay so that Iran will no longer call us “chopped uncs“

It feels lawless because Kaw is Law and the Battlehawks have yet to kickoff

I’m cracking cold ones and watching soccer. Highly recommend

Young Edgar Allan Poe suiting up for the Stockton Ports

@imlikedexter.bsky.social is this true?

There has to be some small satisfaction in having the only good mastodon toot

I don’t mean to sound like a firebrand, but I’m less than satisfied with this arrangement

Would be neat if someone ever suffered a consequence for being evil

Marty supreme on my mother’s side

And some deep cuts as well for the real letterheads out there

some of my favorite letters in this thread

Abolish ICE use its budget for a new CCC is a double whammy great message. Government money can be used for productive things and not just wanton violence