Handsome Bigfoot Lawyer

Grindr: where the guy you were about to degrade yourself by sleeping with leaves you on read

I heard about it but did not watch. I could definitely give it a try

I'm sorry I unfollowed you. I still want to have sex, but you're also the most insufferable person I've ever interacted with

Great minds stare off into the middle distance for 20 minutes in the shower thinking about grammar alike

It's weird when someone calls themselves a DILF, because grammatically they should probably use DYLF

Like, nothing serious but maybe he broke his toe or something

I kinda hope he got (non-fatally, but painfully) hit in the parking lot because he was so distracted trying to lug home his tremendous trophy, and now the cats just aren't that important to him anymore more

I was going to lose no matter what because I couldn't find a single copy at my local blockbuster to practice with. I assume pizza cat guy had rented them all to eliminate the competition

I feel like he should not have been allowed to represent that way, I'm sorry. You pick one anthropomorphic fighting animal team obsessed with pizza, and you stick with it

When I was in junior high, I went to state in a Blockbuster sponsored videogame competition, and lost playing the TMNT fighting game to a guy in a Samurai Pizza Cats shirt

Me too, but they're all fictional and ~60% of them are from D&D

The way randomly running into one of your favorite people who you haven't seen in years can make your whole life feel good again

And that's why I'll NEVER work on AI anything

When I was like 24, I was working as a producer for this company that put on tech demos, and I wrote a program that automatically did most of our jobs of asking for deliverables. And it increased productivity enough that they laid off 75% of us, myself included

Nor was I at 16 mid-masturbation

And then one day I turned the sound up and heard one of them go "yeah, fuck me with that hot homeless cock" which was a choice....

So I used to watch it as a teen with no sound, because I didn't want my mom to hear, and there's a scene where these two guys bang in a storm drain and then this other guy shows up to join in and I was like "oh I guess that's their friend"

My second favorite video set in a storm drain after the gay porn Skaterboard Sliders 2

Except that some of us did, in fact, start the fire

Yeah but I wear it on my cock

My point is that the author of this article is dumber than I was as a teenager

And when I was a dumb teenager, I used that story to be like "trans people are just confused gay people." But now I understand that what I really wanted was less stringent gender norms, which also means allowing people to transition if they want to

When I was a kid, I once saw a really pretty jeweled ring at a thrift store and my (now very supportive) dad told me I wasn't allowed to get it because it was girl shit and I briefly thought I wanted to be a girl cause girls got to wear pretty rings (don't cancel me, there's more)

White wine with ice cubes and sprite. I keep it in a thermos next to my toilet. You misheard me

Wesker was shirtless on it

Also I also love the pool party, it's the thing that kept me out of the Mantamar pool when someone shat in it

I haven't walked up it yet, but I used to stay at the very tippy top of the hill and it would take a full like 45 minutes from Mantamar, so I think I can handle it. At least until tomorrow when I start complaining the entire time

If you can include you falling asleep in a sunbeam like a cat it's appreciated but not required

You love a hotel that's equipped for the gays

I wasn't fishing for that but I'll take it