Chris Stanley

Villa game innit

SEGA: "Behold the Mega Master Dream Machine, the most powerful games system ever devised by man."

Nintendo: "Here's the Super Happy Family Box."

Also forgot to mention that she pointed to Life of Pi, and said (a direct quote): "see that film? It's a load of rubbish. He gets in a boat with a lion. Wouldn't happen." The keen-eyed among you will recall the DVD cover is a close-up on a tiger's face.

I wouldn't have minded, but one of the things I was buying was The Rock.

Not to mention two other women in the back came through to add likewise opinions, like if Macbeth had been provoked by three Barry Normans.

Bought five DVDs in a charity shop today, and while scanning each choice the woman behind the counter said "haven't seen it", with a tone that suggested I was a cross between a mug and one of those effete students they have these days.

I think the bus I catch must be made of Alka-Seltzer, because it disappears every time it rains.

I'm going as "want to pop to my office for a quick chat?"

Manchester City appear to be playing as extras in Tron today. #avfc

I'm still on there. It's mostly memes about Arne Slot and screen captures from the 1995 Radio Times.

One of the things I've noticed as I'm spending more time here is that people talk about checking on Twitter like they've piloted the Event Horizon to a dimension of pure chaos, and now they're offering you their eyeballs on a bed of watercress.

Was watching that 40 Hidden Gems at the BBC thing last night and Starship were doing 'Sara', and you could see Grace Slick struggling to resist the temptation not to grab the mic and shout something random like "kaleidoscope butter spreads nicely on toast".

Ordnance Survey maps but for your loft.

Make a movie food:

The Unbearable Lightness of Blini

I do the same. I dread to think where I'd be if I didn't.

And the clocks go back this weekend, so that'll help.

SAD's hit me again like a tonne of bricks, lads.

When the brass comes in, it sends my stomach all wobbly.

Someone on Facebook has just posted a photo of my primary school football team from 1991, and if anybody needs me I'll be consoling my mum that she gave birth to a goblin.

It's a brilliant show. Enjoy!

I have a complete Pro Set, left in the loft by the previous owner. As someone who never completed my own collection, it was a delightful find.

This could be a Tales of the Unexpected.

How much is a 2010?

Most books are too long. They should be the equivalent of a 90 minute film and shouldn't just leave things hanging for a potential sequel.

Which on their terms means about two years away from a major final.

Is it me, or are Germany a bit 99-00 these days?

It's not as if my mum doesn't know music: she saw The Beatles, Hendrix, Dusty Springfield et al. It's just she's only ever half listening to anything said on a telephone.

Told my mum that I had managed to grab two tickets to Kraftwerk but the seats were a bit shit. She said, oh, they won't sell out, will they?, as if Kraftwerk were a comedy pub act and not a pioneering recluses who rarely tour the UK.

Just to add, this was a selfie before selfies were things. I hadn't left the country before and here I was at the World Cup Final on my own.

Me from a different era: at the Fan Fest in Berlin during the 2006 World Cup. I quit a job so I could write about football. I don't know what happened to that guy.