Jeremy Woodcock's Avatar

Jeremy Woodcock

@jeremywoodcock

TV writer (This Hour Has 22 Minutes), comedian, trivia, food, crosswords, LearnedLeague, piano, other things obviously, lot of hours in the day

187
Followers
26
Following
44
Posts
14.11.2024
Joined
Posts Following

Latest posts by Jeremy Woodcock @jeremywoodcock

Me: Is it on Amazon?

My mother: No. Amazon Prime.

09.02.2026 21:26 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

My mother: What’s that show I was watching again?

Me: The Night Manager

My mother: As opposed to The Night Agent?

Me: As opposed to… anything else. Any other title.

07.02.2026 21:27 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 2 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

it's giving tree.

07.12.2025 16:14 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

As a kid in Canada with access to Billy Joel's Greatest Hits I & II CDs, but no access yet to higher education, until teenagehood I thought Dien Bien Phu Falls were some famous waterfall.

04.12.2025 14:36 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

They say the classic Casablanca line β€œHere’s looking at you, kid” was improvised. Wow. πŸ™‚ I wonder if that’s why it makes literally no sense πŸ™‚

23.09.2025 12:05 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Post image

tfw L.A. proves too much for the man

04.09.2025 19:45 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Lord knows I have

04.09.2025 19:44 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

It would be more fun if a Breathalyzer measured how many "sheets to the wind" you were.

13.08.2025 15:55 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Post image

Rocking out HARD today with the help of #AppleMusic 🎸What about you, what's your own #Weekend #Whammy?

03.08.2025 19:32 πŸ‘ 5 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

3 months into his reign and I can’t help notice Pope Leo XIV has been conspicuously silent on the issue of seed oils πŸ‘€

31.07.2025 13:31 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

We must let ourselves say Joni Mitchell is one of our greatest songwriters, a stunningly open yet oblique lyricist/composer, a singular maverick of rare daring, self-assurance & bravery. But we must ALSO let ourselves or at least ME say "California" just kinda sounds like a less interesting "River"?

18.07.2025 14:35 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

🎡
hold me now
i’m six feet from the edge
and I’m thinkin’
I’m adam clayton
or perhaps larry mullen, jr.
not bono though
he’s usually way closer
🎢

13.07.2025 23:36 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Marley had dreads, to begin with.

09.07.2025 23:29 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I'm on a "sea salt" diet. If I SEE someone doing a summerSAULT I tell them they shouldn't eat right before doing one. Not sure why you're calling that a "diet" though.

27.06.2025 12:31 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I would imagine Arnold Schwarzenegger has pretty much got to be a millionaire by now, right? Decades of hard work, in several different fields, he’s probably beginning to inch into, if not beyond, seven figures. And deservedly so!

15.06.2025 16:52 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Oooh, GLOW's Marc Maron has a podcast?

04.06.2025 21:58 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Sign on door: β€œCash is not accepted in this location.”

Sign on door: β€œCash is not accepted in this location.”

Tango just opened a store, and folks, the hatchet has NOT been buried.

24.05.2025 13:21 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Street sign for β€œNorista Street”

Street sign for β€œNorista Street”

Good luck finding coffee in THIS neighbourhood.

20.05.2025 10:56 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
The Weekly Show with Jon Stewart poster

The Weekly Show with Jon Stewart poster

Not usually one for the Mandela Effect but I could *swear* this always had a different name

17.05.2025 00:54 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to hold onto an aeroplane

14.05.2025 13:15 πŸ‘ 6 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
14.05.2025 13:33 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Back CD cover of The Band's debut album Must From Big Pink with track listing

Back CD cover of The Band's debut album Must From Big Pink with track listing

"You should check out this great band."

"Cool, what are they called?"

"The Band."

"No, I mean their name."

"The Band."

"Oh, weird."

"No, they're real relaxed & laid back & folksy & warm!"

"Ok, I could use a little of that! What's the first track on their first album called?"

"Tears of Rage."

14.05.2025 13:18 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Fun Q: who would be on your "Mount Rushmore" of presidents?

Mine's gotta be Washington (completed & dedicated 1934), Jefferson (completed & dedicated 1936), umm Lincoln (completed & dedicated 1937), and, gah I feel like 4th is always hardest lol? Probably Teddy Roosevelt (completed/dedicated 1939).

14.05.2025 13:13 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
A sign about a bike-crossing rule, but the road looks like a cross on its side.

A sign about a bike-crossing rule, but the road looks like a cross on its side.

And lo when the Anti-Christ does arrive, he will be atop a Schwinn 10-speed.

13.05.2025 14:03 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

β€œFoes” would have been a funnier word

08.05.2025 19:03 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

New P-P-Pope in place, p-p-pope replaced

08.05.2025 18:48 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Box labelled PRICELESS/IRREPLACEABLE KEEPSAKES.

Box labelled PRICELESS/IRREPLACEABLE KEEPSAKES.

The moment I labelled this box, I realized that if I do have any enemies, I make things very easy for them.

08.05.2025 18:46 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I love you dearly, Carol. I do. Why else would I make you a playlist?

But when you play my playlist on shuffle, Carol, you insult my abilities as a sequencer.

02.05.2025 20:06 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Headline - "Obituary: Francis spent his final days in service of the church"

Headline - "Obituary: Francis spent his final days in service of the church"

Very "on-brand"

21.04.2025 12:59 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I have to find what Phil's said on the matter.

11.04.2025 16:52 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0