Pants, the UromancerπŸ§™β€β™‚οΈπŸ’¦πŸ‘–'s Avatar

Pants, the UromancerπŸ§™β€β™‚οΈπŸ’¦πŸ‘–

@captainpants

πŸ‘–legwearπŸ‘–respectπŸ‘–zoneπŸ‘– (pronouns he/they)

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11.01.2024
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Latest posts by Pants, the UromancerπŸ§™β€β™‚οΈπŸ’¦πŸ‘– @captainpants

Hey now! Maybe he tried eating his own cum, and spontaneously discovered a nut allergy? Poor guy goes into anaphylactic shock and...naaaaah, I can't go on with this. πŸ˜…

03.03.2026 01:53 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

...thoroughly unhinged spicy-request, *GO!*

28.02.2026 06:41 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Had to unlike so I could like it again!

26.02.2026 04:19 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

To be fair, Tammy Lane Meteorite is pretty great, too?

25.02.2026 00:55 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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a screenshot of a video game with the word boogie at the top ALT: a screenshot of a video game with the word boogie at the top

Finally playing through Clair Obscur: Expedition 33, and I don't think I've related to the name of an NPC more than Ultimate Sakapatate.

(also its battle music goes SO HARD)

21.02.2026 04:41 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Clinging to hope here that you see a pivot to positive personal circumstances so very soon! 2026 has been so...profoundly cursed and downright evil so far.

18.02.2026 04:12 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

YEAH, it seems fantastic! Anyway, I'm very much looking forward to checking this platform out more thoroughly, and I absolutely hope it flourishes – and you flourish on there, too, of course! 😊

11.02.2026 19:19 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Ooh, I love this! As a Custom Silliness Enjoyer, I appreciate the "Attach Reference Images" feature to allow for another way of approaching concepts (poses, costuming, and all that) where verbal description might not work as effectively. Plus, better payout, HECK YEAH.

11.02.2026 18:36 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

...y'know, if watersports had an annual tournament, "Super Bowl" would still be a fairly suitable name for it.

08.02.2026 19:49 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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a cartoon character talking on a phone with the words to shreds you say ALT: a cartoon character talking on a phone with the words to shreds you say

Ruined? 😈😈😈

30.01.2026 22:54 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Ooh! Possibly me, except a...maaaaybe slightly more unhinged variation. 😳

27.01.2026 03:50 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

UGH NO, I'm so sorry! I hope you've since had your access restored, or are at least able to get it resolved soon, while the new tag's still active! 😟

09.12.2025 00:59 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

...I know I may receive my own burst of heat for this, but saying you'll "viscously punish them" makes me think you're planning to, uh, submerge them in peanut butter or somethin'.

(I'M SORRY)

04.12.2025 06:48 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Heck yesss, so happy to see you've joined Fansly! Easily my personal fave among all those snazzy fansites. 😍

29.11.2025 07:05 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Honestly, I especially like "Uromancer" because it feels like it might irk the ghost of William Gibson.

...wait...

...oh, he's still alive. Uh-oh!

29.11.2025 06:58 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Cursed new name time? Sure, why not! Embracing my inner piss wizard. (Whizzard?)

29.11.2025 06:57 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0
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a red sign that says ludicrous speed is lit up ALT: a red sign that says ludicrous speed is lit up

Yesssss, ~ludicrous speeeeeed~

29.11.2025 06:50 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Apologies, I'm just whining into space now. I know I shouldn't be on here (or on social media in general) any longer, as the good vs harm balance swings far too strongly towards the latter as of late, but I dread burning the last few connections I still have out here.

03.11.2025 02:06 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I *kinda* feel like I'm screeching into a void lately – even more intensely than I've grown accustomed to over the years. Ghosted in the middle of projects, seeing emails and messages ignored, that sort of thing. Compounding it with personal strife as of late, I'm...completely exhausted here.

03.11.2025 02:04 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Ooh, *love* a spicy skirt-y squat, though! 😊

28.10.2025 04:17 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

WOOHOO! Congratulations, you are now...

*types 55378008 on calculator, flips it upside-down, shows it to you*

26.10.2025 01:07 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
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a girl with purple hair is wearing a red jacket and a black turtleneck ALT: a girl with purple hair is wearing a red jacket and a black turtleneck
26.10.2025 01:06 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

YOU *ABSOLUTELY* have this, and I hope you find satisfaction in every second of training along the way!

26.10.2025 01:05 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

lol, thanks! 😊

26.10.2025 01:04 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

While I'm absolutely keeping the evening clear for this, I wonder if I should just take the whole day off from work to *really* embrace the anticipation!

26.10.2025 01:01 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

This whole situation has been...entirely cursed and oh gosh I'm so sorry about all your hardware damage, but YESSSS, at least your data's intact and that particular worst-case scenario has been averted!

22.10.2025 15:41 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0

WOAH GOSH, sorry for the late response but all of the joyous wishes for the next few days, and especially for Friday's surgery, of course! HOORAY IT IS HAPPENING AW YEAH

Anyway! See you next year!!! πŸŽ‰

22.10.2025 15:27 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

YESSSS, that's wonderful! Frolic onward, Mo! πŸ’œ

21.10.2025 01:30 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

oh

I...

hmm.

14.10.2025 00:17 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 0

Ooh! Hades, maybe? First game's one of my all-time favorites (and the sequel officially left Early Access and "released" on Thursday) – I'd definitely recommend looking into it to see if its gameplay and aesthetics might be to your liking. Plus, it's on sale for just over $6 on the Switch right now!

27.09.2025 17:52 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0