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hormeze

@hormeze

what a strange time it is to be a dead star reanimated by chance and patience go to hormeze.com im giving out free peanut butter and knuckle sandwiches there

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10.04.2023
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Latest posts by hormeze @hormeze

ok i made one! https://hormeze.substack.com/

29.05.2023 23:38 ๐Ÿ‘ 0 ๐Ÿ” 1 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

Hey Cosmos :)

I'm moving to a new home that isn't full of mold and is in a quiet area next to a hiking trail and is twice the size of my current place

I'm also really really sick, it sucks

Hbu?

20.06.2024 04:17 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

Checking back here to make sure my bunker is well stocked

13.06.2024 17:09 ๐Ÿ‘ 14 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 2 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

Why do shards of glass always taste like blood

03.07.2023 23:20 ๐Ÿ‘ 4 ๐Ÿ” 1 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 1 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0
Post image

god's very first words to humanity:

13.06.2023 16:23 ๐Ÿ‘ 3 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

my 'i didnt come here to fuck spiders' shirt is not doing a good job of distracting people from what im doing with the bottom half of my body (fucking spiders)

08.06.2023 06:48 ๐Ÿ‘ 4 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

just found 'genital-bergl' (genital hill) is yiddish for mons pubis

30.05.2023 18:07 ๐Ÿ‘ 0 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

i have a pavlovian response to doorbells, when i hear one i automatically listen for barking and if i dont hear one i get sad :(

30.05.2023 04:45 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

making love = sex
making out = kissing
making hate = repetitive stabbing
making in = throwing up in someones mouth

29.05.2023 23:42 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

<3

29.05.2023 23:38 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

ok i made one! https://hormeze.substack.com/

29.05.2023 23:38 ๐Ÿ‘ 0 ๐Ÿ” 1 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

im back whatd i miss

29.05.2023 02:25 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 1 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

lose lips sink ships but lose hips float boats

13.05.2023 18:58 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 1 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

Q.E.D. Q.E.V. Q.F.C

11.05.2023 17:01 ๐Ÿ‘ 4 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

if you die in a dream, you dont die in the waking world. in fact you get closer to life. you wake up. if you cum in a dream, you cum in real life. cumming is more real than death

11.05.2023 17:00 ๐Ÿ‘ 5 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 1 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0
03.05.2023 18:20 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

walked in to a dr's office super stressed, blood pressure was fairly high which has never happened to me before. they tested again, still high. third time, i went non-dual, blood pressure went back to normal

02.05.2023 19:12 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

I'm surprised there aren't tons of water fountain fetishists. Who among us has not been in middle school on their tippy toes sucking for dear life on a fountain with bad water pressure flashing back to the comfort of their infancy

01.05.2023 19:17 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

"It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious." - Oscar Wilde

01.05.2023 17:53 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 1 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

So much respect for my president

01.05.2023 03:43 ๐Ÿ‘ 4 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

some cries are like peeing through a boner. other cries... are like cumming through a boner

01.05.2023 01:42 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

MILK TRUCK ARRIVE

01.05.2023 01:26 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

what do yall do in the two seconds it takes from clicking 'load new notifications' until you see the new notifications

01.05.2023 00:56 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

The government doesn't want you to know this but with a pure heart and the right combination of exuberant movements any dance floor can open a portal to all other dance floors

30.04.2023 20:24 ๐Ÿ‘ 3 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

using my left hand scroll so it feels like someone else is doing it

30.04.2023 01:55 ๐Ÿ‘ 2 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 1 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

purple. even more purple when i found out u like purple most

29.04.2023 06:26 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

just teared up a little bit

29.04.2023 00:52 ๐Ÿ‘ 3 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 1 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

ive never been so grateful for a sunburn in my entire life

28.04.2023 23:50 ๐Ÿ‘ 3 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

Oh skeet skeet motherfucker. Oh skeet skeet godamn

28.04.2023 20:33 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0

You do not have to. You do not have to. You only do not have to

28.04.2023 20:32 ๐Ÿ‘ 1 ๐Ÿ” 0 ๐Ÿ’ฌ 0 ๐Ÿ“Œ 0