Satire
Homeland Security just updated the threat level to “Mile High.” ✈️
06.03.2026 13:05
👍 793
🔁 148
💬 42
📌 12
Satire
Homeland Security just updated the threat level to “Mile High.” ✈️
We definitely need that extinction level asteroid
Your battery is fine, an accessory is leeching power while it’s sitting there
Mine does this, it’s dead after three days if I don’t drive it
If you're at the airport and Kristi Noem is doing the ominous little message from the TSA screens, you no longer have to do anything she says. Leave your laptop in the case, whatever.
If by “overhaul”, you mean “break it up and crush all the parts into cubes, then put those cubes in prison”, sure
It's an indictment on the rest of us 99% that there aren't guillotines waiting on the arrival tarmac
Considering the reasons for the war weren't three dimension chess, this checks out.
How the heck was that 37 years ago? 😬
This is a recording. At the tone, you can leave a message to request anything you might need. We'll do our best to provide it. Our feelings for you haven't changed. But after everything that's happened, we just need a little space.
Hey Claude! How about a nice game of tic-ta… I mean global thermonuclear war.
Barron Trump
Draft Barron
Fetterman the fucking fucker
I remember arguing with him on Twitter back in the day when he, in all seriousness re-stated the trope that the Nazis were socialists because it was in their name.
They refine a lot of oil
It’s been 22 years since Jay and Lindsay from Frenzal tore them apart
Glad it’s finally over, but a long career that made them a packet is probably still a victory for them
Only now? Why not 20 fucking years ago
www.abc.net.au/news/2026-03...
UN review finds Australia must do more to protect basic rights, highlighting poverty, housing, social security fairness, climate impacts and ongoing asylum concerns humanrights.gov.au/about-us/med...
Oh no you don’t. Australia will not let its lapdog status be usurped.
#SendBarronToWar
❤️
It’s disturbing that the military just follow any old brain fart he has
Too late to trade in?
It’d be great if it’s shingles, that can be painful. Although it could just be ketchup that’s ricocheted off the wall.
Twitter?
"Drowning in Disinformation?"
Say it ain't so, Mindless Führer.
I hate how accurate this tweet is.
The world is on fire thanks to these gullible morons
"Zoning and economic impact"