Zach Heltzel

Might have something to do with how obviously unjustifiable it is. A self-sustaining feedback loop of idiocy and evil.

I feel like it would just take one Pokémon looking at Pikachu and asking “why doesn’t he need to live in the ball?” to lead to some fuckin changes in that society

The obvious wisdom and effectiveness of Housing First is obscured by the fact we've made "a tiny, no-frills apartment" an expensive status symbol in huge swathes of the country by creating an artificial housing shortage

People love to go out of their way to tell me that they don’t think I’m attractive. Like, this happens to me like once every two months. Is that a normal thing to occur?

"I feel liberated," said a top banker. "We can say 'retard' and 'pussy' withtout the fear of getting cancelled... its a new dawn"

We should never ever forget why they did it

Once someone you love starts talking to you like they’re HR, you basically never want to put yourself in that position ever again.

The Chevron by me off Sunset went from $4.69 to $5.59 since we attacked Iran and I imagine it’s going to get a lot worse.

Somebody call Kristen Bell and Adam Brody because NOBODY WANTS THIS

What a lot of people call “clarity” is actually revisionist history.

Wow

It's probably the opposite: The CIA boosted rock music in the 1950s to stop kids from listening to jazz

It's too bad i'm not important enough for Isaac Chotiner to interview because i'm pretty confident I'd be the first person to come out of it looking pretty good

A Love for Films

At this point I have no idea how anyone perceives me and I don’t think it is socially appropriate to ask.

We've renamed the DOD the Department of War. Our troops are Warfighters. No of course we're not "at war" you dumb lib

God, he’s like the Matt Damon puppet from Team America.

Serious question: has every rich person been kicked in the head by a fucking horse?

She's like an old samurai whose great battles are behind her but every once in a while she kills a man with piece of paper just to prove a point

Claude (which like any AI has a knowledge cutoff date a couple of months ago) finds out about the newest Middle East War during a research (screenshot from Reddit).

I feel you, Claude, I really do.

ngl I'm surprised how few liberals were joker-fied by the public response to the Biden pull out from Afghanistan

lmao the industry finale hahahahahahah

That song was inescapable on the radio when it dropped.

Can old people please stop having their brains cooked by the internet

Might fuck around and start writing Lydia Tár fanfiction.

She is doing the score to Rush Hour 4.

Ayatollah Khamenei taught me it was okay to be weird.

a 2013 tweet from Ali Khamenei the Supreme Leader of Iran: "man has a responsibility to understand hashtag woman's needs and feelings and must not be neglectful toward her hashtags emotional state"

Welp it’s been a good run I guess

I think most people have categories for their relationships and the folks who fill those roles are the variable.

Meanwhile, I’m out here treating individuals like constants, iterating back and forth on the role best suited for them.

Don’t be like me.

I mean, sure, Trump and Netanyahu are genocidal pedophiles, but they’d never do *that*

Oooh, establishment politicians are starting to thread the needle.