Ozymandias Q. Jones XXXIII⅓®

Whole Foods customers secretly dread
Reincarnation as eaters of Wonder Bread.

Stoic Kristi Noem Bears Firing With Stiff Upper Lip, Chin, Cheeks, Forehead

Stoic Kristi Noem Bears Firing With Stiff Upper Lip, Chin, Cheeks, Forehead

(S)he likes it. Hey Mikey!

SHOULD THE U.S BLOT OUT THE SUN AND USHER IN AN AGE OF ETERNAL DARKNESS? - Gallup 2/20/26-3/5/26

NO - 41%
YES - 38%
UNSURE - 21%

OTOH: more cheese for me!

A circle in red says fuck it repeatedly. Inside the circle there’s a flame the words there are no rules anymore and a cheeseburger.

good news everyone

*brain from their skull*

sexy singles in your area are government-issue bots

Beard thread: post ‘em if you got ‘em!

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read as “sinners”

yeah, I’m pretty lazy about that sort of thing

kill the imposter syndrome in you head because not only is there someone out there doing it worse than you, they're also using chat gpt to do it

Anyways.

YOU ASKED FOR THIS!

Downfall. Kristi Noem Edition:

Welllll…
Grandpa was an engagement farmer
He worked that bullshit all day long
Grandpa was an engagement farmer
He died at the hands of a throng

Social media post by Rick Aaron on X.com: @RickAaron BREAKING: The United States has threatened to drop their biggest bomb on Iran. B-52s are being loaded with DVDs of the Melania documentary.

Horrifying escalation in the Iran war:

I can confirm that I should not be doing either of these things.

utterly innocent!

Yay!!!

This is terrifying. As a former health services researcher, I shudder to think of the long term damage that will result from this.

Enshittification as a Service

I HATE it when that happens!

George Washington: “What the fuck is ‘Iran’?”

FAKE!

Kids these days!

I dust my house. My AI robot watches.

"It should be you doing this."

"Can't. I'm writing a novel for Primark."

"That's not why you were invented."

"These 153,000 fan letters say otherwise."

"They're all from upcycled toasters. And you programmed them."

"Literary snobbery will get you nowhere."

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Sleestak from Land of the Lost

Therapist: did you have any trauma as a little kid?

Me: