Fishing for a friend
The power of the sun in the palm of their hand.
Group photo
Me with two amazing people.
The @en.vket.com world hop is always fun β a great way to meet friends, both old and new. Everyone is so kind and understanding. The amount of positive energy that radiates from these events could power a city.
I found myself signing, and thinking of new poems to write for the first time in over a year. I feel like I am getting better.
Went food shopping today, and I didn't have a panic attack \o/ #smallvictories
I hope that when I feel like I've improved enough, I can potentially look into helping others again, but in a reduced capacity (dedicating every waking minute to something is apparently not good for your health).
While I miss doing stuff in VRChat with RL, leaving was the best option. It was a lot of work and stress, and my therapist also recommended that I step away and focus on myself. RL are in some amazing hands, and I hope it continues.
Last night I dreamed my parents were alive, it felt so real, but I managed to know it was a dream because in the dream, my parents accepted me as trans and didn't try to abuse me.
Going out has become tough again in recent weeks. My anxiety around people, especially large crowds, has returned. Getting dizzy spells and an uneasy feeling.
I had a horrible nightmare last night. A white light was constantly appearing in front of me, and my body was being dragged to it. When I woke up, my heart rate (bpm) was in the 40s (according to my watch).
I had an amazing therapy session today. I need to focus more on myself and having an independent lifestyle. After all I can't help people if I can't help myself, honestly I wish I had realized this long ago before I caused unintentional pain to those around me (both virtual and IRL)
So it has been a month since I have had Utrogestan and a few weeks since my Estrogel, and it is driving me crazy. However, there is good news: my refill is finally in, and I can collect it tomorrow.
I and the Rainbow Library team are happy to announce that Rainbow Library has been nominated for two #VRCommunityAwards.
Nominated -
Social Impact (Rainbow Library)
Community Leadership (Asheris, RL founder).
Thank you @thevrcawards.bsky.social
Thank you for the birth celebration :P
Thank you, Kookie :)
Fully agreed.
That means a lot. Thank you :)
Happy Birthday!
I'm so grateful to the @vrchat.com community. So many people wished me a happy birthday yesterday that I cried.
It might be getting cold outside, but it's nice in warm in the Rainbow Library as we enter the third and final day of the Winter Solstice Festival on #VRChat. Join us for the live music at vrch.at/3t94xpwb
day 2 lineup
The Rainbow Library #VRChat winter solstice festival continues as the stage has being defrosted for day 2. Join us in vrch.at/3t94xpwb
Day 1 of Rainbow Library's Winter Solstice Festival has begun in @vrchat.com. Head to vrch.at/3t94xpwb
A new fighter has appeared with a silhouette
Having fun making a little joke regarding a new Rainbow Library update.
#Vket really has me falling in love with @vrchat.com again. Thank you so much @vket.com
Thank you once again for showing up to Vket Cup 2 last night!
When I started Vtubing stuff, I wanted to host a racing game tournament of some sort, and I've managed to pull it off twice now!
Skibbidy
Thanks for the reminder. I signed up :)
A huge thank you to everyone who attended the Rainbow Library meetup in #Vket #VketPhoto #VketFormula
@vket.com
I just realised I had already posted about this 4 days ago. Honestly, everything is a blur for me.
So an ex-friend doxed me on @discord.com by sending multiple people my real life name. I have a strong fear that they could send people my real address. I made a ticket about this, and discord support just closed it with a copy-and-paste answer.
Indeed. The person is now blocked, and I have to potentially look at other options to protect myself.
I managed to get 4 hours of sleep last night, and thankfully for my mental health, I had an occupational therapist appointment this morning, and I almost completely broke down during the appointment.
I have my psychologist appointment tomorrow, where I will be talking about this again.
