Alma

AND HE FILLED UP MY CAR WITH GAS WHICH I DIDNT NOTICE UNTIL THIS MORNING

Also yes you can get a box of 13 cookies at McDonald’s for cheap and they are pretty solid cookies

Romance isn’t always grand gestures. Sometimes romance is your husband going to get a cookie tote at McDonalds without a second thought just because you asked, even if he also just handled the kids’ bedtime all by himself. I love this man.

Grocery shopping drains me for the entire day, but I always end up unhappy with grocery delivery if I do that instead. It truly just sucks.

The only thing that makes me panic more than a palmetto bug indoors is a wasp indoors.

Someday I will be brave enough to post this on Facebook

No one wants to live near a data center but everyone wants to share their shitty AI slop portraits

👀

*starts saving up for a flight for a Denver wedding*

Leo, like many autistic people, struggles with eye contact. But he loves holding my gaze for an extended period of time until we both crack up. And I think that’s beautiful.

Somehow didn’t make the connection that having a goofy guy’s kids would produce goofy kids

Rly wish google maps would add an “avoid unprotected left turns” option.

He’s onto us

The kids really ate with certain slang because I find myself thinking “r u deadass rn” at work.

But when their baby teeth start falling out you get to start keeping those bones!

Immediately this morning he was looking for specific monster trucks, they gotta come back up lol

I’m on Facebook because there’s a lot of support groups for my kids’ conditions. I am SO fucking sick of seeing AI generated images being shared as something cool, it feels like they have really ramped up in the past couple of days.

Me in memory care headbanging to Dir en grey.

Why tf am I trying to just get a little power nap in and I had a dream I drove off a bridge. Rude

FWIW if someone did this to me I’d be happy that they thought of me to poke me

Typically I am meek and deferential on the phone but if anyone needs a Karen to make annoying phone calls for them, hit me up exactly right now, extremely limited time offer

Feeling like a monumental bitch because of PMS does have its upsides. I was able to Karen my way through multiple medical phone calls this morning and get earlier appointments 🥰

I was going to comment on TikTok saying that I was so proud of you but I didn’t want to be embarrassing so I’ll say it here

Post a car picture you took

Was in an awful mood this morning but I unexpectedly found a super cute dress at Walmart and the fitting room attendant and I had a cute “Hi Barbie” moment when we realized we were both into the retro pinup look and that’s why we both loved the dress.

Working momcore: reviewing patent law rules on my kid’s iPad because it means less distractions from work notifications or texts

Don’t be a coward

I hate when books are marketed like “what if (known IP) combined with (other known IP)?!?!” Like no even if this story was original and cool now I’m not interested because you’re selling it as a cheap combo.

Hi, I’m preeclampsia.

No cheating, reskeet with the most recent photo of your pet

Land of the free to poop in any public restroom, home of the plentiful toilet paper.