Princess of Whales

😂

So you’re saying you would be shocked into immobility? Fair enougg

Pictured: Markwayne Mullin cowering behind a row of chairs during the January 6th insurrection.

Corey better get working on a relationship with mark Wayne I guess

How i learned

Fucking awesome

both myself and my son’s mother are heavily tattoo’d. each school met us once and then we never heard another word about his appearance.

I remember when I got called in to my kids' teacher to have a conversation about him drawing on his arms and legs. I showed up heavily tattooed like: Yeah, I'm not going to tell him to stop, but thanks.

autistic kid's teacher is trying to convince me not to let my kid draw on her own clothes. who cares if she draws on her own clothes. i am not going to tell her not to draw on her own clothes

This is going to be an evergreen skeet, I can feel it

BYE FELICIA

OH NO NOT HIM

Congratulations DHS Secretary Stephen miller on continuing to be DHS Secretary

Does Noem know she's been fired?

She's giving a speech in Nashville....

😂

dude you're a fucking restaurant website why do you care if I'm a robot ordering lunch

Markwayne Mullin Reportedly Fingered Nostrils of Colleagues and Their Spouses During Visit to Israel

what fresh hell

Markwayne in the Membrane

Noem’s been tossed down Cypress Hill. Marky Markwayne’s too legit to quit. Reader, I haven’t seen a posse of clowns this insane since Dubya overtook Poppy back in the day

by Maureen Dowd

Who gets the love jet?

Waffles the giraffe at the San Antonio Zoo. Today is her third birthday

The San Antonio Zoo is not on here but today is Waffles the giraffe’s third birthday and I just felt like this was need to know information today, with everything else being so terrible

anne hathaway sitting in front of a zoom camera, smiling at it. It looks like HR is about to fire you

POV Kristi Noem logging onto a last minute Zoom and HR is there

I don’t need drugs to get high, but they certainly expedite the process.

lmao mullin is going to fucking *hate* this job, i will be surprised if he’s in it a year

Sister..I used your brush on the dog. Me.. I dried your jeans on high heat in the dryer.

There it is: Noem out, Mullin in

Make sure you eat protein, fat, and carbs for maximum aliveness

You me and lizzo!

The amount of times I’ve panicked looking for my phone while it’s literally in my hand is embarrassing.

🤣🤣🤣

three men are standing in a room with lockers and one has a towel around his neck Alt: three men are standing in a room with lockers and one has a towel around his neck

tfw you have very limited choices from which to fill cabinet posts.

YES

(looking at my Rolling Stone album covered in moss) Jimi Hendrix lied to me