mjSensei259

Projecting my PTSD trauma onto Reader and Molten Freddy in my fic rn

My biggest flex is despite actively trying to find one that takes me out, I haven't found a single "if this is your f/o, you're out" that clocked me.

ruining my layout because I thought this was funny

I do apologize if my statements were a bit all over the place, I'm not great with words /gen

just being paranoid/distrusting of people cause of experiences I've had with situations like these.

ok I giggled at that 💔

I'm just kind of explaining where I stand tbh, I know logically speaking my argument kinda makes it so I don't really have much of a reason to be suspicious, I just am for some reason, and I'm not gonna immediately assume she's a bad person because of it, I think it's me

Esp with what i said before, I don't think that many BIPOC would be comfortable being close friends with someone who actively held racist/nazi beliefs. Only reason I'm still sus is cause of how her apologies changed, but I'm also just a very distrusting person so that's probably a factor.

She actually kind of did, like there were screenshots that surfaced of her making antisemitic and anti-black comments, up until about 2021 I think. However it definitely still doesn't seem like she holds those beliefs anymore so as long as it doesn't repeat, I think she's probably changed.

so many people harassing them, sending them slurs, etc. There were huge mistakes on both sides and I don't think Bliptoons are bad people, I think they just need a more professional PR team, which can be said for a LOT of indie studios.

I wanna add here though on my criticism of Bliptoons. While I think there were definitely some things that were very unprofessional, esp them retweeting a post from someone who was being kind of a dick to someone for civilly disagreeing, I also can't imagine the kind of stress they were under having

Obviously this is just my take on it and I don't wanna be super involved, I just wanted to say this since I know POC who actually know her and have discussed this with me or have made public statements on it.

Not directed at you btw, just in general. I think regardless if she's genuine in her apology, it's not obligatory to forgive her. It's when people start harassing her and anyone who associates with her is where it's not okay.

and I really don't think Bliptoons handled the situation very professionally. That being said, I feel like people trying to ruin her career isn't gonna help anyone. But at the same time I don't blame POC at all for being uncomfortable with her and I'm not a huge fan of how some people ignore that.

so my take is if THAT many BIPOC and a couple Jewish folks are comfortable around her and actually close friends, including Jake Neutron and a other BIPOC, I think it's safe to say she's probably not a Nazi anymore, however there's some discrepancies in her apologies that make me raise an eyebrow,

I'm still very sus of her, mostly because of how her apology changed and I think it's kinda weird how she blocks people who bring it up, even if it's civil. However I'm white so idk if I really have the right to say that + I know people who know her personally, many of who are BIPOC themselves

This post is about an actual friend of mine, he knows who he is.

"Beatboxing with a harmonica while juggling and spinning a basket ball on a book is so hard"

That one friend who's talented at damn near everything for no reason:

Funtime Freddy is technically a vehicle.

i had my crashout a couple nights ago and im still in an episode but im alive and i just wanna say that just in case

I WILL NEVER SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT HIM DW 🫡

WAS NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT THEY WENT THROUGH, I WAS JUST A WITNESS- I don't understand how THIS of all things I've been through has ruined me for seven. fucking. years.

Sorry for the vent, I just need this off my chest and have nowehere else to say it.

I still flinch if someone I care about even mentions money problems in passing. 4 medications, 6 therapists, 3 hospital visits, countless relapses, and a suicide attempt (maybe two, I don't remember that night enough to know for sure), 7 fucking years and I'm still like this, AND WHAT I WENT THROUGH

Hefty TW for discussions of a past attempt, SH, food insecurity, general PTSD venting
I was never food insecure but I had to watch people I cared about go through it and saw shit no 14 year old should have ever seen. Now all those people are in better spots but

I wish there was a way I could make someone else feel what I'm feeling or experience the memories I did without yk actually doing anything to them because I'm so fucking tired of people trying to invalidate my trauma just because it's so specific.

I must face my fears..........

I need money cause I gotta commission someone for a 3D model of Molten from my x reader fic 💔💔💔 /hj

yk, Count The Ways never calls Freddy "he"

Have we considered the idea that CTW Freddy could be a woman? /hj

Thank you to the people who have been patient with me, but until further notice, all comms except sketches are closed. Because the way I'm doing comms now is not sustainable nor is it professional of me.

This is not the fault of anyone else, this is ENTIRELY on me. This isn't me saying I hate doing comms, I actually enjoy doing them when I'm able to lock in.

But it shouldn't take me over a year to do two pieces. And until I can get my shit together, I don't wanna make anyone wait like that again.

From here on until

1. My life isn't as unstable as it is
2. I have an actually effective way to treat the fact I have no motivation for art anymore

I will not be taking anymore full shaded comms. At most I'll do sketches that's it.