That Ocean Smell 🇵🇸

"I'm sorry to say this but you're either too stupid to work here or you were in on it"

Using the time machine to go to 1985 and then offering Beverly Carol Aikins $50 for her baby

if you believed this you should be fired on the spot because you are one of the dumbest people alive

Ok, fuck it. I’m going on farrier Instagram.

“the cost of gas doubling is a small price to pay” is an incredibly funny thing to say as the head of a political movement that in many ways is still built on a nationwide psychosis triggered by having to go about four weeks without a haircut six years ago.

You know main stream journalists are whipped bc we haven’t heard the phrase “wag the dog” even once in coverage of the assault on Iran. It must be a cliche reserved for democrat administrations

Thinking of becoming a hometown account.

I’ll post stuff like, “yea out of towners, you suck,” and “real locals only eat at Ma’s Feedbag: Desegregated Since 1991.”

And so forth

Anyway, tell me more about this Shia Islam…

Fuck, this new Ayatollah is just going to confuse The President. He thought he killed that guy!

Americans are so dumb they need to be told that military bases are military targets

Bird had babies to feed.

“Wow that helicopter is loud!”

Nah bitch that’s a V-22.

They have a distinct dropping whistle noise when they’re landing. I hate how tuned into jet engines my ears have become after living here for 10 years.

Smoking a joint and two f-35s did a touch and go at the neighborhood airport

Ok I’m calling it now, Dodgers win 2026 World Series in 5.

But not with a confidence that like, I want this shit retweeted in 6 months. That won’t work. Don’t put in the paper I was mad.

Yea I wonder where Russia got that idea

$5 gas? Bruh, I’m in California. Stop fucking crying

the cheapest and most abundant and utile political resource for the american ruling class is muslim life. this has been true my entire life. you can never go wrong slaughtering muslims

Counterpoint : Fuck you, Judge Asshole.

Dudes my bad, I’ve cut back a lot. I didn’t realize my weed purchases was keeping the economy afloat

Sen John Fetterman ran one of the biggest grifts in recent memory. I'm saying that during the Trump Era. That's some impressive shit-sucking on John's part.

It's all good. The President has volunteered us for cannon fodder.

this will never catch on because Hollywood executives can't abuse their power to sexually harass ones and zeros

You know who should be impeached?

Your mom.

Omg there’s like, 3 Avatars.

Damn we really vaporized a whole school. Pure evil 🇺🇸

the only consistent funny thing about trump is how little he respects anyone in his orbit