Running for Congress on a platform of sneaking into Polymarket HQ and unplugging all their stuff. Overflow crowds at a local Knights of Columbus hall roar with delight as I promise to pour Florida's Natural Grapefruit Juice (with pulp) into the USB-C port of every computer in the damn place.
they've all had work done but compare her to like noem or matt gaetz, she looks much more normal
there was a point in 2020 where i was really hoping they would keep to the oscar rules that movies had to be theatrically released and they would just pick from whatever crap studios had released by mid march. BAD BOYS FOR LIFE and SONIC THE HEDGEHOG going head to head in all major categories
feel like she would've done it by now if she was gonna do it
see, three years ago, "stealing a child's dog" would be the most cartoonishly evil thing you could imagine a cabinet-level official doing to a dog. but now it seems mostly fine. she loves dogs! maybe a little too much, haha! bsky.app/profile/jsth...
lmao
[the attorney general, who has launched a number of transparently political prosecutions at the behest of a corrupt, authoritarian president, is testifying before congress and ranting about the dow for some reason] whew, at least one of these people looks normal
hopefully this isn't too Problematic but the fact that pam bondi hasn't MAGAfied her face makes me respect her a lot more
putting best actor last on the understanding that it would posthumously go to chadwick boseman and then giving it to anthony hopkins, who was thousands of miles away and asleep, is the funniest thing they've ever done
I love being a guard for a crime boss, but I hate when coworkers hear a noise and go walk away and don’t come back. We were in the middle of a conversation, rude! Not my job to find him though.
next Dem trifecta just changes the date and passes the IRA again, unaltered
hear me out: what if you simply DECLARED victory, and then—this is the important part—went home
lmao
if only there were some kind of peacekeeping force, possibly pur together by several nations united in purpose
the energy, the power exhibited, on this move is aspirational
is that bad
Perhaps diaspora communities should be given grace and also not granted the presumption of special knowledge or influence around shit happening in the old country, as a general matter.
To take this seriously a sec: when your political-economic system allows massive inequality to explode, it creates a class of people who have no material problems but do have the resources & power to make their trivial irritations the central business of politics—at immense material cost to others.
I hate Tik Tok speak.
I have agents, editors and proofreaders! I do digital contracts! I make ebooks!
Sometimes I legitimately have to talk about PDF files!
new comics curmudgeon post! joshreads.com/2026/0... it's called LinkedIn, lady, look into it why don't ya
sucks they can't work with minors rn
but not to worry, on my new site TONTEENS,
"MDNI": weak, generic ❌
"yo brother, legal team confirmed we can't work with minors rn": personalized, powerful ✅
First time I saw The Apprentice, I thought, "Hopefully someday I will be informed of this man's every bruise or skin condition."
First they came for the trans people, and I said nothing because I wasn’t trans. Then they were like actually I’m pretty sure you are trans and I said no I’m not and they went okay well show us your penis then and I said what no get out of my face and they said that one’s a girl get her
Cmon man you can’t look like all the members of Sublime were put in the machine from The Fly together and say this
!!!!!!!!
you're right and you should say it
intellectual history [debate between various ostensibly socialist factions] once again trumped by material conditions [where natural gas pipelines go]
it's definitely one of those two things
Anakin Skywalker building C-3PO
