Stephen Uitti he/him/it/they/hey-you

Breaking: The United States as threatened to drop their biggest bomb on Iran. B-52s are being loaded with DVDs of the Melania documentary.
#joke

I speak 10 languages: binary & sarcasm.
#joke

I'm stuck with the worst thesaurus in the world. Not only is it bad... It's bad.

oh noooo i misplaced my thesaurus im feeling disoriented, lost, adrift, discombobulated, bewildered, unsettled, perplexe- oh wait there it is nvm

Title text: Roses are red Mercury's in thermometers. Road sign has super-dented car with huge moose in front of it. Under the sign, in the same color style has: INVINCIBLE MOOSE NEXT 5 KM

Do cows that go to Alaska become moosicles?

and taking the covering off a wire is stripping

Why would a pig dressed in black never get bullied?
Because Batman has sworn to protect Goth ham.

Not all construction work is equally enjoyable. For example, enlarging a drilled hole is boring, but fastening pieces of metal together is riveting.

Mixing paint is... stirring.
#joke

There was once a zoo that had only one animal, amd it was a dog. I've got nothing against dogs, but this sure was a shitzu.

You're here because someone in your group kept watch all night. Now you know when your shift starts. Be nice if employers knew this stuff.

There are only 3 seasons, if i recall.

The plan was to *consume* each, then quit. Have a nephew who did that, apparently successfully. $10/month give or take.

Apparently an example that after Monday and Tuesday comes WTF.

Yes. Though there's also a new Disney Dr. Who offshoot called, Dr. Who. I've not been following the BBC line for a long time.

Dropped cable TV in 2005. When i got a new broadband provider, 3 years later, i did not pick up TV. For COVID, picked up Paramount. Disney also as Orville. An excellent series. Single writer, but that also put show production chronically behind schedule. Consider it Star Trek cannon - it isn't.

Andor is now on Disney with the rest of Star Wars. Just like all of Star Trek is usually available on Paramount. Disney (through HULU) has the 1 season of Firefly. 'Serenity' is the ship's name. I've not heard of a Serenity series. Andor is like 16 episodes, and has the feel of 2 7 hour movies.

Started as a kid's show. In the 80s had deeper content writing. I can't watch the early shows anymore.

TOS had a bunch of excellent writers... and Rodenberry modified that to fit his agenda. Pissed them off.

Big Bang Theory had a single group of writers that collaborated on all shows. Better consistency.

I'm totally OK with actors rocking from side to side as a special effect - despite inertial dampers & no seat belts. Smoking consoles despite triple redundancy, & so on. Nothing wrong with campy. Dr Who does this too.

Best show, IMO, is Andor. Two seasons. Star Wars. Just before Rogue One movie, which is just before first Star Wars - episode 4, A New Hope.

Strange New Worlds is In the Trek timeline just before TOS, just after Discovery. Pike is Enterprise Captain. Spock is Science officer.

What's that that they say about short term memory?

Ad for a T-Shirt: Schrödinger's Mood :):

Older guy in bed trying to get to sleep. Bed: Remember when you wet your pants in second grade? Bed: Remember when your locker combo was 14-32-5? Bed: Remember when you spilled coffee in last week's staff meeting? Title: Jeff soon regretted buying a memory foam mattress.

There are three things that happen to you when you get older. The first is that your memory starts to fade. I forget the other two.

Apparently to start a zoo you need at least two pandas, a grizzly and three polars.
It's the bear minimum.
#joke

Inventions:
The invention of the stove sure was a hot topic!
#joke 10 of n

Book titles
Track in the sand, by peter dragon
#joke 6 of n

PROTOLOL jokes
A packet header walks into a bar, the bartender holds up a gun to the packet, statefully.
#protolol
#joke

Busy at Bar Today:
Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
#joke 27 of n

Star Trek jokes:
Q: What do the Klingons do with the dead bulb?
A: Execute it for failure.
#joke 27 of n