Ambs🖤

Is it too much to ask to lay in the forest and listen to sad music at nighttime

Okay but does anyone ever kiss the foreskin like a forehead kiss?

Nice comeback… piss lord(???)

Poop goblin 👹

hi 👋🏻 byeeee ✌🏻

Bad day? Divorced dad rock. Good day? Divorced dad rock.

If you can’t drive through the metro parks, or any dark street without knowing how to turn your brights off when other cars are coming, MAYBE DONT DRIVE AT NIGHT???!

Important humans saw first, but NEW HAIRRRR and no filter??? CRAZY

Ima just shake my ass and try to not check my phone obsessively

YES

Dude I’m baffled, I was wondering why I saw notifications I couldn’t get rid of on Spotify… IT WAS A MESSAGE???

So blocking a number wasn’t enough, you had to message me on SPOTIFY OF ALL THINGS?

I know it’s not much but I’m very proud of myself

I just wanna proudly say, I’ve been consistently working out for about a week now and staying hydrated

Did you shake your ass today

Kinkyyy

Lemme drop this and run

Mardi Gras? I think 🤣 YES MARDI GRAS

My back hurts though so I’ll pay someone two dollars to rub it

TO BE FAIR IT’S ALSO FAT TUESDAY

I cleaned more today… forgetting it was lunar new year…….. oops

I need to not be able to see when people pop online, all it does is give me more anxiety

I’ve spent the better part of today cleaning

Don’t you wish that evil on me 😐

for always 😭

25% hot
75% mess

Me and Tito’s are no longer friends

Worked out for the second day in a row 🥳

excuse me… WHAT???