Marc

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I think we need more research on this topic. I volunteer as tribute 🙋🏻‍♀️

broke down and got 32 toothbrushes

lil stretch before we snack 🤣🤣🤣 these lil house finches are funny

Can someone please come stuff some hay into my ears so I can appear semi-functional at work today?

Cock rockets candy and a penis sucker

It’s like they know me or something.

Not wife material, more like side piece material.

Cave art with text that says we have been going through some shit since the dawn of time.

The human condition

Imagine your parents hating you so much they name you Markwayne.

I could have fried in your arms tonight it must have been some kind of piss

I like to pretend all of your subskeets are about me

I find people so annoying when...actually that's the end of that sentence. I find people so annoying.

Can my weird hang out with your weird?

Some of you have never been to Boogie Wonderland, and it shows.

Currently maintaining an optical illusion that I'm sitting at my desk at work when in fact I'm at home with Floyd and all I used was a sack of potatoes, two mirrors and a paper clip.

the great thing about the internet is that we have access to so much information

the shit thing about the internet is that we have access to so much information

How I feel when someone blocks me

Lieutenant Soto sitting at her desk and saying to Morgan "I feel like I lost track of this conversation before it started". High Potential

When people speak to me before the caffeine hits

"many of you requested to be transferred to another peanut factory..."

you think the quality of that reply was bad?

if only you could’ve seen all the ones I typed out and immediately deleted (aka the vast majority of my replies)

hey keep it down 🤫

I’m yearning

I like to yell ‘bombs away’ when I cum so I’m regretting coming to Dubai for my honeymoon.

My beautiful new wife on the other hand is regretting staying chaste until our wedding night.

When I got to work earlier this morning. Caught this lil bird singing a melody. Had to stop and listen.
Yk what they say. Early bird gets the worm.

My definition of love,
is what comes from the soul. 🪐 🌎 ✨ 🕯️