This moment in time really drives home the FIFA Peace Prize’s stellar reputation for significance.
05.03.2026 18:59
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This moment in time really drives home the FIFA Peace Prize’s stellar reputation for significance.
Say there’s an emergency and leave. 😂
But listen, I am no longer dining in a restaurant with metal seats. I’m not in prison.
www.instagram.com/reel/DVXPgUX...
This isn’t new for Twitter but it always makes me laugh
Anything to deflect.
never install motion sensor lights because if they go off by themselves, best case scenario, that's a ghost
I like the idea of having guests.
Sometimes, when reading, my brain likes to switch live (as in living) and live (as in catch this show live). I know the difference, but my brain wants to make it more interesting.
Like someone who gets hit in the mouth for the first time
I’ve been maybe 4x in my life. Twice just for a concert/show. I’m not a farm or fair kinda gal.
It’s Ramadan and that means my neighbor is doing 600lb dead lifts at 11pm for the next month.
Why do you have her socks on?
No worries babe. We have our anxiety to keep us warm
When your friend who isn’t from here asks you to explain the state fair:
Him: ::minding his own business::
Me: You know men can scissor, too
Him: why do you say things like that?
I switched to hazelnut creamer just to feel something. What stage of winter is this?
I just read an article saying that Boomers are retiring because they don’t want to work with Gen Z. Finally, a generation that is enacting change.
IMAGINE! “I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me god. Lindsey Graham is gay.” -Laura Loomer
😂😂😂😂 I hope they eat each other alive
Listen, I'm a little mean, I don't mean to ask what's wrong with your eye when you wink at me, I just have worked in the ER and you're either an accident waiting to happen or an infection and I do not work off the clock.
It’s not raining, but the sound of this ice melting and sliding off and away is as cozy as a summer thunderstorm.
Been pretty quiet in the Mitch McConnell camp. As granny used to say, no news is good news, and man do we need some good news.
Who could’ve guessed Lindsey Vonn’s knee wouldn’t make it through the Olympics?
Also, no shade to Gary Busey who has always kept it 100
Jelly Roll looks like he stole Gary Busey’s teeth.
Does anyone remember when George HW vomited in Japan and we, as a nation, were mortified? Now this guy shits himself and everyone acts like it’s no big deal. IT IS A BIG DEAL
Our groundhog didn’t see his shadow and that’s what I’m going with. Confirmation bias at its finest.
19 more days until Spring Training unless he finds a way to fuck that up, too.
